Named Ted Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

506 Results for Named Ted

View 21 - 30 results for named ted comic strips. Discover the best "Named Ted" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #natural, #mental, #peaks, #knowledge, #improve, #performance, #hourly, #temperature, #readings, #identify, #avoid

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits in a chair across from a man. Dogbert says, "Every person has natural daily rhythms of mental peaks and troughs. We can use this knowledge to improve your performance." Dogbert hands the man a thermometer and continues, "We use hourly body temperature readings to identify and avoid the troughs." As the man leans back in his chair and waves his arms, Dogbert writes, "One o'clock. We have encountered a severe trough. I fear it could be the dreaded 'El Nino' trough."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #straw, #loser, #kill, #abusive, #coworker, #floyd, #blue, #short, #murderer, #cheater

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted says to Dilbert and Wally, "Everybody pick a straw. The loser has to kill our abusive co-worker, Floyd." Ted says, "Dilbert loses. He picked the blue straw." Dilbert says, "I thought the SHORT straw loses." Ted replies, "You're already a murderer; don't be a cheater too."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #floyd, #killed, #Wally, #alice, #first, #aid, #ambulance, #firstaid, #phone, #ted

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally, Ted and Alice confront Dilbert. Alice says, "We heard you killed Floyd, our unbearable co-worker, yesterday." Dilbert replies, "No. I was there, but he choked on his own bile." Alice asks, "What did you do - perform First Aid? Call an ambulance?" Dilbert replies, "I don't know First Aid." Dilbert asks, "Uh . . . Can I use your phone?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #violence, #the boss, #Dilbert, #alice, #ted, #program, #humor, #kick me, #relaxed, #creative, #advantage, #situation

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss hands a sign to Dilbert, Alice and Ted. The Boss says, "As part of my program to use more humor at work, I'm asking each of you to wear a 'kick me' sign." The Boss tapes a sign to Dilbert's back and says, "I'll check later to see if you're more relaxed and creative." Later, the Boss says to Alice, "You seem to be taking unfair advantage of the situation, Alice." Dilbert and two male co-workers stand covering their groins and looking like they are in pain.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the boss, #alice, #Dilbert, #video game, #plateau, #Kids, #outside, #diversify, #pollute

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Alice, Dilbert, Ted and a woman sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Our video game division has reached a sales plateau." The Boss continues, "Kids are spending more time outside these days. There's only one thing we can do." Dilbert asks, "Diversify?" The Boss replies, "Pollute!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #objections, #Funny, #faces, #rambling, #monthly, #daily, #the boss, #Wally, #meetings

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally, Alice, the Boss and Ted sit at a conference table. Ted says, "If there are no objections, I'd like to make funny faces and tell a long rambling story." Ted continues, ". . . So, then I said 'You want the MONTHLY report, not the DAILY report.' . . . But that got me thinking . . . So . . ." Ted says, "Blah blah blah" and waves his arms. The Boss thinks, "I can top that."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #meeting, #the boss, #change, #lowered, #expenses, #increased, #revenues, #financial, #situation, #blinding, #flash, #obvious

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, the Boss, Alice and Ted sit at a conference table. Ted says, "Whoa whoa! I just got an idea that could change everything . . ." Ted says, "What if we LOWERED expenses and INCREASED revenues? That could help our financial situation." Ted yells, "Aaagh! I can't see!!!" Dilbert says to the Boss, "Sounds like a blinding flash of the obvious, sir."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #creativity, #consultant, #exercise, #research, #support, #method, #company

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a desk and says to a man, "This exercise is especially for the MBAs in the company." The man asks, "What's the payback?" Dogbert hits the man on the head with a bat several times. Dogbert says, "There's no research to support this method, but you gotta admit it feels right."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #ted, #dog, #computer, #working

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted sits at his desk. Dilbert asks, "What are you up to, Ted?" Ted replies, "I'm working like a dog lately." Dilbert walks away thinking, "I'd better not ask." Ted scratches his head with his foot.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ted, #the boss, #typo, #budget, #spreadsheet, #pay, #work, #happiest, #day, #life

View Transcript

Transcript

An employee says to the Boss, "I found a typo in the budget spreadsheet . . . It's too late to fix it." The man continues, "We transferred one job to another group but accidentally kept the money and headcount." The Boss tells another man, ". . . So, we still pay you but you aren't allowed to do work." The man thinks, "This is the happiest day of my life."