Storytelling Skills Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

119 Results for Storytelling Skills

View 21 - 30 results for storytelling skills comic strips. Discover the best "Storytelling Skills" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 27, 1996's comic on:


Tags #new manager, #keith, #masters in business, #motivating employees, #hire good people, #optional reading, #finance and economics, #alice

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Alice, I'd like you to meet the newest member of my management team." The Boss continues, "Keith is highly qualified, he has a masters in business administration." Alice and Keith shake hands. Alice says, "Very impressive. They must have taught you a lot about motivating employees." Keith replies, "No, not really." Alice says, "Well . . . You probably learned how to identify and hire good people, right?" Keith replies, "That might have been optional reading." Alice asks, "Did you learn negotiation skills? Strategic thinking? Business writing?" Keith answers "No" to all three questions. Keith explains, "It was mostly finance and accounting. And economics." Alice says, "So, you're a highly qualified leader because . . . You're good at math?" Keith whispers to the Boss, "What should I do here?" The Boss replies, "In these situations I like to use swearing."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 26, 1996's comic on:


Tags #yelling, #boss, #diagree, #oor interpersonal skills, #class, #improve them, #snarky remarks, #Dilbert, #boss projects

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss sits at his desk and tells Dilbert, "Whenever we disagree, I always end up yelling." The Boss continues, "That's an indication that you have poor interpersonal skills. I'm sending you to a class to improve them." Dilbert says, "It looks like you've gained weight. Would it help if I started jogging?" The Boss replies, "This is exactly what I'm talking about."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 27, 1996's comic on:


Tags #school for interpersonal skills, #Dogbert, #good relationships, #huge phony, #three fundamentals, #loud, #simple, #smiley, #low pressure system, #weather

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands at the front of a room and says, "The secret to good relationships is to be a huge phony." Dilbert and Wally sit in the class. Dogbert clicks a remote control and says, "Let's practice the three fundamentals." A slide projection lists, "Loud, Simple, Smiley." Wally shouts, "Hey, how about that low-pressure system, huh?!!" Dogbert stands on a stool and says, "Again, but this time say 'weather.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 1996's comic on:


Tags #computer screen, #drivers side window, #interpersonal skills, #stupid person, #windshield gone, #without rolling eyes, #yugo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a stool and Dilbert sits in a chair. Dogbert says, "This lesson in interpersonal skills involves listening to a stupid person without rolling your eyes." A man says, "My computer screen says, 'Press any key to continue.' Can I borrow your keys? Mine are locked in my Yugo." Dilbert covers his eyes and thinks, "Must focus . . . Must . . . Focus . . ." The man says, "I could break the driver's side window . . . But it's bad enough that the windshield is gone."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 1996's comic on:


Tags #description, #taxi, #cheat, #running the meter, #flat rate, #poor language skills, #efficnecy, #taxi running people

View Transcript

Transcript

An attendant says to Dilbert, "This taxi is yours. Here's a description of how he'll cheat you." Dilbert sits in the back of the taxi cab and says, "It says you'll be running the meter despite the flat rate. Then you'll feign poor language skills when I question you." The driver looks crazy. Dilbert says, "I can't fault your efficiency, though." The driver hits a bicycle and a pedestrian.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 1997's comic on:


Tags #employee rock climbing seminar, #valuable teamwork, #skills, #rock climbing, #open jars

View Transcript

Transcript

An instructor standing next to a rock climbing wall says, "Welcome to the employee rock climbing seminar." The instructor says, "You'll learn valuable teamwork skills by doing dangerous things unrelated to your job." Dilbert, Wally, and Alice look skeptical. Wally says, "Isn't rock climbing a solo activity?" Dilbert says, "I'll help identify your body." Wally says, "It seems like you need a strong grip to climb rocks." Wally says, 'I can't even open jars unless I use special tools." Wally grips his arm and screams, "Ow! Cramp!" Wally says, "I'm disoriented by the pain!" He falls into the others and knocks them down. Dilbert says, "Hey!" The instructor awards them their certificates and says, "Here are your diplomas. Now get out." Wally, Dilbert and Alice are in a heap on the floor. They all think in unison, "Go team!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 21, 1997's comic on:


Tags #recruiting on campus, #judging me, #job interview, #engineering knowledge, #ancient, #confidence, #people skills

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption: Recruiting on Campus. The nerdy college studnet says, "It's funny that you're judgein me. My engineering knowledge is current while yours is ancient." Dilbert writes on a note pad. The nerd thinks, "I think I impressed him with my confidence." Dilbert writes. The nerd hits himself in the head. "Ooh! People skills! I forgot!" Dilbert writes.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 04, 1998's comic on:


Tags #career talk, #boss, #office, #work you, #health deteriorates, #obsolete, #downsize, #plan work fast, #ill

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stadns in front of the Boss who is sitting at his desk. Dilbert says, "I'd like to talk about my career path." The Boss says, "Okay." The Boss says, "My plan is to work you until your health deteriorates and your skills are obsolete. Then we'll downsize you." Dilbert holds his stomach and says, "I'm ill." The Boss says, "Really? I've never had a plan work this fast before."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 01, 1998's comic on:


Tags #good news, #budgets, #calculations, #salary bidget, #vacation days, #got greedy

View Transcript

Transcript

At the staff meeting, The Boss says, "Good news on your budgets. I did some recalculating last night." The Boss says, "I found a way to give more money to every project without increasing the total budget for projects!" Wally raises his hand and says, "Question: Does your new way involve poor math skills?" Wally has a question mark above his head. Alice puts her arm in front of him and says, "Ignore the skeptic. Hey, I have a suggestion!" Alice says, "Maybe you could recalculate the salary budget for next year." Dilbert says, "And when was the last time you recalculated the vacation days?" Wally, using his calculator wrist watch, says, "I calculate that we have an hour left for this meeting, but I'm interested in YOUR caculation." Dilbert, Wally and Alice walk out of the meeting counting stacks of money. Dilbert says, "I think we got greedy when we asked if he change for a five." They whistle as they leave.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 15, 1998's comic on:


Tags #brand equity, #increasing skills, #kleenex engineers, #sneeze, #kleenex, #engineers

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally comes up behind Dilbert, who is sitting at his desk, and says, "While you toil in utter futility, I'm building my personal 'brand equity.'" Wally continues, "I'm increasing my skills and my contacts every day." Then, as Alice approaches, adds, "My goal is to becomes the 'Kleenex' of engineers!" Alice bumps into Wally, knocking the glasses off his face. She says, "'Scuse me, I have real work to do." Alice brings her hand to her mouth, as she says, "Ooh... sneeze coming." She opens her mouth wide, "Aaaah..." "CHOO!" She sneezes in Dilbert's cubicle and Wally's glasses go flying again. Wally is now gone. Alice and Dilbert remain. Alice tells Dilbert, "I think of Wally as the 'Kleenex' of engineers." Dilbert agrees, "Me too."