Angry Rich Guy Comic Strips - Page 3

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639 Results for Angry Rich Guy

View 21 - 30 results for angry rich guy comic strips. Discover the best "Angry Rich Guy" comics from Dilbert.com.

Arresting The Rich

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Arresting The Rich - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 27, 2018's comic on:


Tags #money, #rich people, #arrest, #discrimination, #equality

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Police Officer: Before I arrest you, I'll need to know your net worth. We have a slightly different process for arresting rich folks. Dogbert: I'm very rich. Police Officer: In that case, I'll wear the handcuffs.

Cryogenic Investment Firm

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Cryogenic Investment Firm  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 2018's comic on:


Tags #cryogenic, #intelligence, #rich people

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Narrator: Dogbert's Cryogenic Investment Firm. Dogbert: We'll freeze your brain for 200 years and then transplant it into a 3-D printed body. By then, your investments will be worth a fortune. Man: Is there any risk to my brain? Dogbert: You'll have an IQ of 45, but that doesn't matter when you're rich.

Exactly What Guilty People Say

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Exactly What Guilty People Say  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 13, 2018's comic on:


Tags #conspiracy, #accusation, #guilt, #innocence, #logic, #rumor

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Narrator: How conspiracy theories happen... Carol: Alice says you deleted her files on the server. Dilbert: That didn't happen. She's nuts. Carol: Ha! You wouldn't be so angry if it weren't true. Dilbert: What? That doesn't even make sense. Carol: That's exactly what guilty people say. Narrator: Continued...

Alice Mentors The New Guy

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Alice Mentors The New Guy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 2018's comic on:


Tags #mentor, #mentee, #competition, #threat, #paranoia, #protege

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Alice: our boss asked me to mentor you. But don't expect too much from me because I see you as a competitor for my job. Man: May I have a mentor who doesn't see me as a threat? Boss: Why? So you can take my job?

Dogbert's Personality Profiles

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Dogbert's Personality Profiles   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2018's comic on:


Tags #consultant, #personality, #test, #business, #psychology

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Dogbert: I have the results of your Dogbert Personality Profiles. Based on your questionnaire answers, Alice is angry, Wally is lazy, and Dilbert is boring. Dilbert: How are we supposed to use this new information? Dogbert: Wake me up when he's done talking.

Success Diminishes Other Guy

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Success Diminishes Other Guy   - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2018's comic on:


Tags #ideas, #diminshed, #support, #stab me, #great deas, #discussion, #argument

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Ted: Your idea is great, but I plan to oppose it because I feel diminished by the success of others. Dilbert: Maybe you could support it now and then stab me in the back later. Ted: That's two great ideas you've had today. Dilbert: thank you.

Insurance For Phones

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Insurance For Phones  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 29, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #technology, #insurance, #break, #screen, #cracked

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Dilbert: The company that insures our mobile phone product is angry because 100 percent of our phones break in the first minute. They say it's a disaster and it is putting them out of business. What should I tell them? Boss: Tell them they should have gotten some sort of insurance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 24, 2017's comic on:


Tags #military, #office workers, #survival, #hero

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Boss: This is our new employee, Mark. Mark was a navy SEAL. He fought in three separate conflicts. He once fought off a hundred insurgents and saved a town. Show Mark how we roll at this company. Dilbert: Today I'll be reformatting my PowerPoint deck because someone said the design is not organic. Mark: What's that mean? Dilbert: It doesn't matter. I'll just push some things around and hope the guy who complained doesn't attend the next meeting. Mark: How do you survive this place? Dilbert: I don't like to use the word "hero."

Ceo Makes More Money In Stocks

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Ceo Makes More Money In Stocks - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 28, 2017's comic on:


Tags #rich people, #money, #stock market, #investments, #out of touch, #obliviousness, #stratification

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CEO: Hey, our stock is up two percent. I just made more money than you'll earn in your entire life. Remind me, do I leave you a tip?

500 Pages Would Be Rubbish

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500 Pages Would Be Rubbish - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 2017's comic on:


Tags #writing, #criticism, #technical writer, #warning, #caution, #safety

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Boss: You need to edit the product warning from seven hundred pages down to one. Tina: Oh, that's rich. I'ma professional technical writer, and you're telling me how to write? Boss: Can you cut it down to 500 pages? Tina: Sure, if you want it to be total rubbish.