Big Charis Comic Strips - Page 3
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323 Results for Big Charis
View 21 - 30 results for big charis comic strips. Discover the best "Big Charis" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday February 07,
2018
Wally Finds Critical Bug
Tags #big business, #bug, #deception, #insider trading, #stock, #trick
Transcript
Wally: I found a critical bug in our software that could make our product worthless in a week. If you give me a huge raise, I won't tell anyone about the problem until you sell all of your company stock. Boss: Deal! Narrator: Two weeks later. Boss: Why haven't I heard about the bug yet? Wally: You didn't ask me if I knew how to fix it.
Monday February 05,
2018
Sunk Costs
Tags #money, #big business, #logic, #loss, #deception
Transcript
Dilbert: The economics of the project have changed. We need to shut it down. Boss: If we stop now, the $10 million we already spent will be wasted. Dilbert: And if we stop later? Boss: The trick is to never finish the project.
Thursday December 28,
2017
Asok's Phone Case
Tags #cell phone, #aesthetics, #impractical, #practicality, #break, #screen, #technology
Transcript
Asok: I kept dropping my phone and breaking it, so now I keep it wrapped in a big ball of cotton. Wally: Why would you buy a phone that breaks so easily? Asok: I like the way it looks.
Wednesday December 20,
2017
Animal Testing Is Done
Tags #app, #technology, #addiction, #morals, #big business, #ethics
Transcript
Dilbert: The animal testing for our app is done. The app is so addictive that Zimbu the monkey was hospitalized for starvation while using it. I think we all know what we need to do. Boss: Submit it to the app store?
Saturday December 16,
2017
Product Is Too Addictive
Tags #social media, #technology, #facebook, #twitter, #addiction, #big business, #impulse control
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm worried that we designed our product to be too addictive. Now we're more like a disease than a consumer product. Boss: Will you stop talking like that if I give you a raise? Dilbert: It's worth a try.
Friday December 15,
2017
Doctor And Dopamine
Tags #addiction, #impulse control, #social media, #twitter, #facebook, #pharmaceuticals, #drugs, #gambling, #technology
Transcript
Doctor: The MRI shows that your brain has been hijacked by dopamine pirates. You are now under the full control of social media corporations, gambling casinos, and big pharma. Boss: Are you writing me a prescription? Doctor: No, I'm buying stock in those companies.
Thursday November 30,
2017
If We Are Off By One Percent
Tags #projection, #prediction, #finances, #big business, #guess, #estimate, #obliviousness
Transcript
Dilbert: According to my highly unreliable forecast, we're on the right track. But if even one of my seventeen assumptions is off by one percent, we are doomed. The obvious conclusion is that... Board: We're nailing it!
Wednesday November 29,
2017
Worthless Financial Projections
Tags #money, #finances, #big business, #projection, #prediction, #guessing, #estimate
Transcript
Dilbert: Here's the financial projection you asked me to do. It's basically just guessing plus math. Obviously, it's useless for making decisions because I can get any result I want by tweaking the assumptions. Boss: Don't say any of that stuff when you present it to the board tomorrow.
Tuesday November 28,
2017
Financial Forecaster Quit
Tags #big business, #money, #projection, #prediction, #Advice
Transcript
Boss: Our financial forecaster quit. I need you to fill in for him. Dilbert: I don't know how to do financial forecasts. Boss: Neither did he. Dilbert: How were you making decisions? Boss: It's better if we don't excavate that septic tank.