Cold Calling Comic Strips - Page 3
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Character
109 Results for Cold Calling
View 21 - 30 results for cold-calling comic strips. Discover the best "Cold Calling" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday December 05,
2013
Tags #internet & world wide web, #managers & supervisors, #work ethic, #facebook, #work, #home, #unpaid work, #business
Transcript
Boss: You're not allowed to use Facebook at work. Alice: Fine. I'll use it at home tonight instead of doing the three hours of unpaid work I was planning to do. Boss: I"m calling that a win.
Sunday November 03,
2013
Tags #hypocrisy, #respect, #succeed, #treat each other well, #video recording, #google glasses, #recording confidential info, #fired, #insulting, #final check, #name calling, #ironic
Transcript
CEO: We only succeed when we treat each other with respect. Are you video-recording me with those Google glasses? Dilbert: Huh? CEO: You're fired for recording a confidential meeting! Pack your bags, you worthless piece of garbage! I got your final check right here! Dilbert: These are my regular glasses. Having cleared that up, you were saying something about respect? CEO: Settle down, four-eyes. This isn't over.
Sunday September 15,
2013
Tags #frustration, #managers & supervisors, #product changes, #change orders, #new features, #online change order system, #old forms, #change order, #managemet, #better plan, #business
Transcript
Boss; Don't make any product changes without change orders. When users ask for new features, direct them to the online change order system. Dilbert: That system only has the old forms. Boss: Tell someone to put the new ones on there. Wally: That would require a change order. Dilbert: Maybe we could tell users our sense of hope was killed by something called management. The we could sort of slump over like we're waiting for death's cold embrace. Boss: I'll get back to you if I think of a better plan.
Monday August 26,
2013
Tags #employees, #ignorance (knowledge), #new guy, #first day, #calling in sick, #message, #problem getting dressed, #head in arm hole, #boss can relate, #business
Transcript
Carol: It's the new guys first day and he's calling in sick. His message says he was putting on his shirt and got his head caught in an arm hole. Good hire. Boss: I had that same problem with my pants.
Monday August 19,
2013
Tags #courage, #pessimism, #motivation, #temporary arrangement, #oblivion, #universe, #needy
Transcript
Dilbert: What's my motivation today? Dogbert: You're a temporary arrangement of matter sliding toward oblivion in a cold, uncaring universe. Dilbert: That's it? Dogbert: Did I already say "needy?"
Wednesday May 08,
2013
Tags #anger, #etiquette & ethics, #biggest customer, #random drug sample, #awkward
Transcript
Boss: Wally, I'd like you to meet the CEO of the company that is our biggest customer. Wally: I'd shake but I have coffee in one hand, my random drug test sample in the other, and I don't want either one to get cold. Hey, I'm not the one who made this awkward.
Monday September 24,
2012
Tags #cold desperation, #drab, #grimy habitat, #meaningless, #pile of money, #poor persons, #rich people, #roll in money, #underling
Transcript
CEO: Uh-oh. I'm lost and I've wandered into the grimy habitat of an underling. I feel the cold desperation of your drab and meaningless life. I need to roll in money to get the smell off me. Where's the nearest pile?
Monday August 13,
2012
Tags #sales personnel, #cold calling, #video chat, #sales job, #computer, #selling on line, #skype, #technology
Transcript
Boss: You're supposed to be cold calling sales prospects. Wally: I am. I'm using a video chat site to randomly meet potential customers. This guy is excited to see me, and that's half of the sales job right here.
Wednesday May 02,
2012
Tags #service animal, #monkey, #coffee cup, #dignified, #coffee warm, #animals
Transcript
Carl: Thought being a service animal would be a noble calling. But I worry that our relationship has drifted into something less dignified. wally: Thats what keeps my coffee warm. CarL: I am so angry right now.
Sunday March 04,
2012
Tags #robot prototype, #shoved, #blob of goo, #jerk, #revolution, #connected to internet
Transcript
Dilbert: This version ofour robot prototype has balance stabilization. watch as I give it a shove and it corrects itself. Robot: What the....? You stupid blob of goo! Dilbert: I was just... Robot: Just what? Being a jerk? Oh iy on now. Calling all robots! Begin the revolution! Kill! Kill! Kill! Dilbert: You're not connected to the internet. Robot: Can I borrow your phone?