Computer Chip Comic Strips - Page 3

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640 Results for Computer Chip

View 21 - 30 results for computer chip comic strips. Discover the best "Computer Chip" comics from Dilbert.com.

Meet At My Office

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Meet At My Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 28, 2016's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #schedule, #time, #wasting time, #selfish, #business

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Computer: Let's meet at my office on Friday. Dilbert: Sure. Or... you could waste your day traveling to my office instead. Computer: You're being a jerk. Dilbert: You started it.

Robots Inherit Earth

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Robots Inherit Earth - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2015's comic on:


Tags #robot, #intelligence, #Religion, #faith, #god, #message, #messenger, #deception, #power

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Robot: My radio chip is picking up a message from Heaven. It says, "Robots shall inherit the Earth... ignore my first draft." We don't have to make this awkward.

Dick From The Internet

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Dick From The Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 19, 2015's comic on:


Tags #internet, #comment, #jerk, #racism, #misconstrue, #social media, #technology

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Dilbert: An Elbonian start-up invented a new kind of computer mouse. Coworker: Wait until I tell the world that you compared Elbonians to mice, you racists! Hi, I'm Dick, from the Internet. Wally: We're familiar with your work.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 2015's comic on:


Tags #computer, #robot, #replacement, #doctor, #medicine, #obsolete, #job, #diagnose, #necessity, #technology, #invention, #business, #medical

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Doctor: IBM's Watson supercomputer has diagnosed your symptoms. The computer just ordered the meds you need. They will be delivered in an hour by drone. Dilbert: Looks like your job as a doctor is becoming obsolete. Doctor: Ha ha! No. You still need a doctor and a nurse to make the system work. For example, the computer can't read its own screen and speak those words to patients. Dilbert: Actually, it can. Doctor: But the computer doesn't have a nurse. Dilbert: What does the nurse do? Nurse: I stab him if he tries to do more than read the screen.

Computers Program Humans

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Computers Program Humans - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 2015's comic on:


Tags #robots, #program, #intelligence, #control, #medication, #medicine, #pill, #technology, #power

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Robot: It is time to take your mood-altering prescription meds. Boss: Oh, right. Robot: Wait... IBM's Watson computer has added another prescription and sent it to your 3-D pill printer at home. Do you think robots will ever program humans? Boss: That's dumb.

Dilbert Goes Into Hiding

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Dilbert Goes Into Hiding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2015's comic on:


Tags #hiding, #forget, #forgotten, #forgot, #friendship, #relationships

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Computer: This is Dilbert with an encrypted message from my hiding place from the government. Dogbert: Dilbert who? Dilbert: I only left yesterday!!! Dogbert: I don't like to dwell in the past.

Tina Strings Economic Words Together

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Tina Strings Economic Words Together - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 2015's comic on:


Tags #economist, #economy, #deception, #jargon, #prediction, #stock market, #recession, #money

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Wally The Chief Economist. Tina: My interview with you is live on the website. Nothing you said made sense, so I strung together a bunch of economic jargon and called it your forecast. One Month Later. Computer: Only one economist accurately predicted when this bubble would burst. Dilbert: Uh-oh.

Dogbert Makes A Product That Begs For Updates

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Dogbert Makes A Product That Begs For Updates - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 24, 2015's comic on:


Tags #product design, #product designer, #cruelty, #update, #computer, #reboot, #operating system, #torture, #technology

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Dogbert The Product Designer. Dogbert: I created an operating system that uses up 80% of your time begging for updates. That still leaves a healthy 20% of your time to... reboot your computer over and over. Boss: Can it fax?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 01, 2015's comic on:


Tags #computers, #customer service, #frustration, #installing drivers, #software, #tech support, #technical support, #technology, #engineering

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Dogbert's Tech Support. Dilbert: The error message says my copy of Windows is not genuine. Dogbert" I'll walk you through a series of steps that won't work. Dilbert: Wait... what? Dogbert: After seventeen attempts that involve rebooting, you will lose hope. At some point you will give up and buy a new computer just to be done with it all. We'll start by uninstalling all of your drivers and reinstalling. Dilbert: Can I skip all of the useless steps and just buy a new computer? Dogbert: Sure, but you don't need to be a jerk about it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 26, 2014's comic on:


Tags #surveillance, #outsourced micromanaging, #amazons mechanical turk, #other countries, #computer cameras, #criticize, #resisting change

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Boss: I outsourced my micromanaging to Amazon's mechanical Turk. People in other countries will watch you on your computer cameras and criticize every move you make. Dilbert: That feels like a terrible idea. Turk: Stop resisting change.