Cost Analysis Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

184 Results for Cost Analysis

View 21 - 30 results for cost analysis comic strips. Discover the best "Cost Analysis" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #deceit, #contract, #cost, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Here's my invoice for the extras. Dilbert: The invoice we already paid covered everything in the contract. Man: That only covered the costs I quoted with intentional clarity. There are other costs that I might have mentioned in the long and rambling explanation that was intentionally ambiguous. Dilbert: "Might have??" I'm sure you did not. Man: Sounds like your word against mine. Dilbert: And even if you did mention it, you just said it was intentionally ambiguous!!! Man: I don't think you want to tell your boss you're a bad listener. Boss: I thought we already paid this vendor. Dilbert: Did you forget all the extras I told you about?

We Need To Talk

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
We Need To Talk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #contradiction, #argument, #disagreement

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The software upgrade will be ready by Friday. Dilbert: Actually, that's when we will start writing it. Boss: And it will save us twenty million dollars. Dilbert: Actually, it will cost a million dollars and save nothing. Boss: We need to talk. Dilbert: We do? I'm not feeling that.

Dogbert's Unreliable Research Company

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert's Unreliable Research Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #research, #truth, #accuracy, #lying, #market research, #yes-man, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'm the CEO of Dogbert's Unreliable Research Company. My services cost less than regular research because all I do is tell you whatever you want to hear. CEO: Is that defensible? Dogbert: I'm sensing you want a yes on that.

Do Whatever The Data Says

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Do Whatever The Data Says - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #study, #analysis, #decision, #conclusions, #bias, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to do a financial analysis on upgrading our customer tracking software. Dilbert: What conclusion do you want me to reach? Boss: We'll do whatever the data says. Dilbert: Which is...? Boss: I already bought the upgrade.

Why Did The Algorithm Bump Dilbert

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Why Did The Algorithm Bump Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #airlines, #air travel, #flight, #overbooking, #customer service

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Why did your algorithm pick me to be bumped from the full flight? Is it because I had the lowest-cost ticket? Agent: It was that plus your lack of upper body strength.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tldr, #email, #communication, #patience, #criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Did you read my email? Dilbert: No, it was too long. Man: Maybe you could read it when you have more time. Dilbert: I never have time to read email messages that are too long. Maybe you could rewrite it to be shorter. Man: I don't have time to rewrite it. Dilbert: And I don't have time to read it. Man: If no one reads that email, it will mean I wasted two hours writing it. Dilbert: Plus, you're wasting my time right now. Don't forget to include that in your failure assessment. Man: I had high hopes for that email. Dilbert: It's a sunk cost. Let it go.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wages, #cost of living, #raise, #money, #rent, #apartment, #roommate, #space

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I need a raise because the cost of living around here is too high. Boss: Stop being greedy. I pay you plenty. Asok: I can't even afford to rent an apartment. Boss: Get some roommates. Asok: I can't afford that either. I've been sleeping on a baby changing table in a public restroom. And the janitor has been charging me $3,000 per month for that. Boss: How wide is the baby changing table? Asok: Not wide enough for a roommate. Boss: Well, I'm out of ideas.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sarcasm, #obliviousness, #future, #psychic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Do these cost estimates include everything? Dilbert: Yes, because I know what happens in the future. I didn't think I could accurately predict the future until you trusted me to put this budget together. I thought there were too many variables to know how things will turn out. But I defer to your superior opinion. Wait... I'm getting another message from the future. It says to raise the software budget by nine dollars. Boss: Okay, that sounds right. Dilbert: Of course it does. Trust your instincts.

World's Saddest Club

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
World's Saddest Club - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #catch-22, #deadline, #lose-lose, #choosing

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Can you get that analysis to me by Tuesday? Alice: Yes, if I do it poorly. Alternately, I can do it well and miss your deadline by a week. Man: That gives me no path to success. Alice: Welcome to the world's saddest club.

Seventeen Hour Flight To Elbonia

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Seventeen Hour Flight To Elbonia - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fair, #comfort, #flying, #money, #budget, #cost, #selfish

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The flight to Elbonia is seventeen hours. Can I fly business class? Boss: No, because your pain will be temporary, but I won't get my bonus if I go over budget. Try being a team player for once. Dilbert: I didn't know Satan had a team.