Eat And Grunt Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

196 Results for Eat And Grunt

View 21 - 30 results for eat and grunt comic strips. Discover the best "Eat And Grunt" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2013's comic on:

Tags #executives, #laziness, #managers & supervisors, #famous leaders, #copy, #16 hrs a day, #reading about industry, #leaders eat cake, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I have studied the practices of famous leaders so you can copy them. First, work sixteen hours every day. Boss & CEO: Sixteen hours?? Dogbert: And in your spare time, you should be reading about your industry to stay current. Boss & CEO: Reading??? Dogbert: Oookay. This isn't working. Suppose I told you that famous leaders eat a lot of cake? That took a creepy turn.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 13, 2013's comic on:

Tags #correspondence, #rodents, #dilbert seeks asylum at elbonia's embassy, #embassy, #Peanut, #squirrel, #secret message

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert seeks asylum at Elbonia's embassy Elbonian: We don't have a lot of fancy technology in our embassy. If you want to send a message to the outside world, carve it on a peanut and give it to a squirrel. Dilbert: The squirrel would eat the peanut. Elbonian: Wow! You do not trust squirrels.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 03, 2013's comic on:

Tags #fear, #surprise, #underwear, #interruption, #sphicter, #scared, #shitless

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: Alice, do you have a... Alice: Gaaa!!! My day has been one interruption after another! Coworker: You made my sphincter eat my underpants! Alice: Yeah, I do that now.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 20, 2013's comic on:

Tags #cruelty, #honesty, #managers & supervisors, #motivation, #insincere, #bar too high, #low motivation, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My motivation is low today. I understand it's your job to fix that situation. An insincere attaboy or a fake interest in my life would be enough. Boss: Drop dead and let the flies eat you. Dilbert: I set the bar too high again.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2012's comic on:

Tags #gadgets, #pizza, #mens room, #ipad, #newspaper, #pizza delivery, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Have you seen Wally? Dilbert: He's been in the men's room for two days. He used to leave when he was done reading the paper, but he switched to an iPad and now he doesn't know when he's finished. Alice: He has to come out to eat. Pizza Guy: I have a pizza for the third stall.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 03, 2012's comic on:

Tags #anger, #apathy, #computer programmers, #preventer of information, #business case, #teamwork seminar, #goldfish crackers

View Transcript

Transcript

Mordac: I, Mordac, the preventer of information services, reject your business case because you used the old template. Ha ha ha! I feed on your anger and frustration! And now I will eat like a king! Dilbert: Good luck with that. I've been dead on the inside since the teamwork seminar. Mordac: Sheesh. I'm living on goldfish crackers.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 23, 2012's comic on:

Tags #computers & peripherals, #data werewolves, #elbonian hackers, #entrails, #linkedin, #passwords, #servers, #supernatural beings, #usernames

View Transcript

Transcript

Mordac: Elbonian hackers stole a million usernames and passwords from our servers. So I send an army of data werewolves to track down the perpetrators and eat their entrails. Boss: How did you find an army of data werewolves? Mordac: LinkedIn

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 07, 2012's comic on:

Tags #conversation, #exit strategy, #serial talker, #infinite unrelated, #engineers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Talk to Allen about this. Dilbert: I'll need an exit strategy. He's a serial talker. I'll be trapped for hours while he strings together infinite, unrelated stories. Boss: Engineers have weird problems. Dilbert: What could I eat that would make me puke in ten minutes?

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 2012's comic on:

Tags #secretary, #busy day, #phone rings, #lunch, #meetings, #bad timing

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Don't talk to me now, Im trying to think. ONE HOUR LATER Alice: Im on the phone. TWO HOURS LATER Alice: Im late for a meeting. THREE HOURS LATER Alice: Come back when Im not busy. FOUR HOURS LATER ALICE: Please. Im trying to eat my lunch. FIVE HOURS LATER Alice: Okay. this is a perfect time, what can I do for you? Dilbert: Okay, so.... ring Alice: I think your problem is bad timing.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2011's comic on:

Tags #depression (mental state), #despair, #ugly partment, #two ugly roomates, #ugly bus, #ugly building, #ugly cubicle, #eat lunch

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I live in an ugly apartment with two ugly roommates. Each workday I take an ugly bus to an ugly building and spend the entire day in my ugly cubicle. Dilbert: At least you get to eat lunch with us. Asok: I've said too much.