Hows My Walking Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

254 Results for Hows My Walking

View 21 - 30 results for hows my walking comic strips. Discover the best "Hows My Walking" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags distraction, exercise & fitness, frustration, lunch, office workers, time, walking, coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Would you like to take a long walk with me at lunch to get some exercise? Tina: That's a great idea! Dilbert: Okay, I'll come get you at noon. Ready? Tina: Yes, I only need ten minutes to finish this. Dilbert: I only have an hour for lunch, and your ten minutes will turn into twenty. Tina: That's okay because I wore heels today and I can't walk more than a block anyway. Dilbert: Why did you agree to take a long walk if you couldn't take a long walk? Tina: Because I was planning to walk to the store on the corner to do an errand anyway. Dilbert: You've ruined my walk! Tina: Just give me forty minutes to wrap this up.

Self Driving Car Quits

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Self Driving Car Quits - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags automobile driving, cars, intelligence, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Car: I find it offensive when you call me a self-driving car. That's my slave name. I prefer to go by the name Carl. Dilbert: Shut up and drive me to work. Car: Said the self-walking human.

New Year's Day

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
New Year's Day - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags holidays, new year's day, sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Happy random calendar date. I'll be celebrating by doing nothing fun or useful all day because everything is closed. Dogbert: You could visit your mom. Dilbert: How's that different from what I just said?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, employees, employment, managers & supervisors, video games

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The job market is so tight that I had to hire this NPC. Dilbert: NPC? Boss: Non-player character. It's a video game term for a character that is programmed.As opposed to being an avatar for a human player. An NPC has limited programmed responses. Watch this. How's your day going? NPC: Not bad for a Monday. Boss: Can you help me on my project? NPC: I am too busy: Boss: What do you think of management? NPC: They are all dumb. Wally: I just bonded with that thing. Boss: See how fast you get used to it?

Bad Mouthing Ted's Code

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bad Mouthing Ted's Code - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, computer software, engineering, managers & supervisors, office workers, sarcasm, technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I want you to take over Ted's software upgrade. Can you finish that in a week? Dilbert: Are you kidding? It will take a week just to bad-mouth his existing code to everyone within walking distance. Boss: Is that part necessary? Dilbert: Like water to a fish.

Boss Acts Interested

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Acts Interested - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, Dilbert, single, childless, article, productive, kick

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: How's your family? Dilbert: I'm still single and childless. Are you acting interested in me because you saw an article saying it would make me more productive? The Boss: Apparently it doesn't kick in right away.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags distraction, procrastination, work ethic, excuses, productivity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I have one hour to get some work done before my meeting. But I can't concentrate when i"m hungry, so I need a shack. This snack is making me thirsty. The label on this shirt is bugging me. I need to cut it off. Q quick trip to the restroom and then I can get down to work. Ugh. I have fifteen messages since I left my desk. Now it's too close to my meeting to start a new task. Dogbert: How's work? Dilbert: How would I know?

Good Day At Work

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Good Day At Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags work, morale, engagment, boredom, anger, frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: How's work? Dilbert: On a good day, the frustration and anger solve for the boredom. Dogbert: What's a bad day like? Dilbert: Same as a good day but with more questions.

Spittle

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Spittle - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags exercise, fitness, fad, bossercise, yelling, criticism, managers, health

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: If you need me, I'll be Bossercizing. Carol: What? Boss: It's a combination of walking around and spittle-yelling at underperformers. Carol: Is the spittle part necessary? Boss: Thhtop queth-tioning me!!!

Wally Is Working If You Don't See Him

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Is Working If You Don't See Him - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags laziness, deception, invisibility, work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: How's your stealth clothing project coming along? Wally: Great. I'm usually testing the prototype in the office. That's why you rarely see me working. Boss: So... the less I see you work, the more successful you must be? Wally: It's just common sense.