Incomprehensible Document Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

174 Results for Incomprehensible Document

View 21 - 30 results for incomprehensible document comic strips. Discover the best "Incomprehensible Document" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #presentation, #powerpoint, #ghost, #ignore, #read, #run, #boo, #injury, #bandage, #hit person

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "The status of my project is that apparently I died and became a ghost." Dilbert says, "I don?t remember dying, but the evidence of my untimely demise is clear." Dilbert says, "In the past week, no one has returned my phone calls or replied to my emails." Dilbert says, "When I try to print a document, I get nothing but error messages." Dilbert says, "Now all of you are looking at your phones and reading materials as if no one is speaking to you." Dilbert says, "I will now test my ghost theory by running through a living person." Dilbert says, "BOOOO!!!" Dilbert says, "Good news. I'm alive but unworthy of attention." Dogbert says, "I'm trying to watch a show."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #email, #document, #attachment, #attitude, #cross arms, #care about time, #pay stub, #smile, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Did you review the document I emailed?" Coworker says, "I don't read attachments." Coworker says, "Attachments say you don't care enough about my time to summarize a document." Dilbert says, "I brought my pay stub to prove that my time is worth more than yours." Coworker says, "Well-played."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #proofread, #technical document, #acronyms, #change, #misread, #bullet points, #idiots, #story, #pet, #wag tail, #dog, #stories, #sit on rock, #outside, #jacket, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "A technical writer misinterpreted the acronyms in my draft technical paper." Dilbert says, "But that's okay because my pointy-haired boss will turn it into content-free bullet points and show it to idiots." Dogbert says, "I like stories with lots of idiots in them." Dilbert says, "Glad to help."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #proofread, #technical document, #acronyms, #change, #lemon flutes, #hard flea, #nonsense

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina says, "I proofread your technical document despite not understanding a word of it." Tina says, "I couldn't tell the acronyms from the typos, so I changed them all to whatever felt right." The Boss says, "You say we should migrate our lemon flutes to a hard flea?" Dilbert says, "Not all at once."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #scan, #document, #ask, #favor, #important, #scanner malfunction, #hope, #empty candy jar, #hopeless

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Can you scan this document for me?" Carol says, "Is it important?" Carol says, "If it isn't important, you shouldn't bother me. If it is, the scanner will malfunction." Dilbert says, "Is there no room for hope?" Carol says, "I keep mine in this empty candy jar."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #assignment, #delegating, #logic, #crumpling, #unnatural, #useless

View Transcript

Transcript

the Boss says, "Dilbert, I need you to take care of?um?" The Boss says, "?.Whatever is on the top of my pile." Dilbert says, "This is a job for marketing. Not engineering." The Boss says, "Give it to the director of marketing and ask him to assign it to someone." Dilbert says, "So...you're delegating to me to pass this off to someone else, who will delegate it to someone else." Dilbert says, "With each handoff, the sense of urgency will diminish until the likelihood of completion approaches zero." Dilbert says, "You could save the company money by crumpling up this document and throwing it away right now." The boss says, "This feels wrong." Dilbert says, "Try using more wrist."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #80thousand, #forboding, #funny story, #paper, #print long document, #printer paper

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Ted, I have a funny story for you!" Ted says,"Why am I filled with a sense of foreboding?" The Boss says, "So I was trying to print a long document, hee-hee!" The Boss says, "But when I went to the printer, the document wasn't there!" The Boss says, "For the next three days I kept trying and trying, but the document never showed up at the printer!" The Boss says, "It turns out I was checking the wrong printer. The right printer used $80,000 worth of paper that week." Ted says, "And how does this affect me?" The Boss says, "You and paper just became an either-or situation."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #copy document, #less valuable, #copy boy

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I need someone to make ten copies of this document. Asok: Is there any risk that performing this task will make me appear less valuable? The Boss: I need someone to tell copy boy to get to work. Asok: Erk o"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #flatten hair, #important document, #option, #put on head happy, #unique filing, #clutter

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Where can I put this important document so it won't get lost in your desk clutter? Carol: I'll flatten my hair so you can leave it on top of my head. Are you happy? Dilbert: I didn't know happy was an option."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #borrow pen, #company like family, #culture, #search computer, #sign docuemnt, #test for dugs, #trust and respect, #manipulate

View Transcript

Transcript

CatBert: This company is like a family. Our culture is based on trust and respect. Now sign this document that says we can test you for drugs and search your computer and your office. Man: Can I borrow your pen? Catbert: Do I look like Bill and Melinda Gates?"