Mobile Professional Comic Strips - Page 3
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77 Results for Mobile Professional
View 21 - 30 results for mobile professional comic strips. Discover the best "Mobile Professional" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 14,
2014
Tags #thinking, #ideas, #sock at, #steal ideas, #double workload, #employee, #boss, #professional realtionships
Transcript
Dilbert: I have a great idea? Boss: What kind? Is it the kind I scoff at, the kind I steal, or the kind that makes me double your workload? Dilbert: It might be all of those. Boss: Sounds good so far.
Friday March 14,
2014
Tags #joking, #mobile (cell) phones, #hearing aid, #quick text, #all caps
Transcript
Boss: I'll just send a quick text to Paul. Wally: Paul has a hearing aid, so type in all caps. Boss: Good idea. Dilbert: That's messed up. Wally: A little.
Wednesday March 12,
2014
Tags #competition (psychology), #mobile (cell) phones, #money, #tiny screen, #enormous phone, #expensive, #paid mortgage, #phone with tiny screen
Transcript
Topper: I see you have a phone with a tiny screen. That must be embarrassing compared to my enormous phone. Dilbert: Is it expensive? Topper: It paid off my mortgage by mining Bitcoins. Topper
Tuesday November 12,
2013
Tags #hypocrisy, #mobile (cell) phones, #phone rining, #fired, #judge, #ironic, #threat, #legal
Transcript
Boss: Anyone whose phone rings during this meeting will be fired on the spot. RRRING! Stop judging me with your eyes. Dilbert: It's the only thing that keeps them open.
Thursday November 07,
2013
Tags #mobile (cell) phones, #monkeys, #company phone, #chimps, #time travled, #own phone
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you know why I need to carry a company-issued phone plus my own phone? Boss: No. Dilbert: I think it's because our company policy was written by chimps who time-traveled from the fifties. Or do you have a better explanation. Boss: I really don't.
Tuesday September 17,
2013
Tags #lying, #new business, #professional liar, #albis, #job refernces, #annual reports, #born evil
Transcript
Dogbert: I'm starting a new business as a professional liar. I'll provide alibis, job references, annual reports, and that sort of thing. Dilbert; Were you born evil? Dogbert: It feels as if someone else had a hand in it.
Monday December 24,
2012
Tags #business ethics, #ad company, #deceptive and abusive, #mobile app, #crying
Transcript
Boss: I hired the Dogbert Ad Company to build some deceptive and abusive ads for our mobile app. Dogbert: I prefer to call our ads "effective." It means the same thing. Our most effective ad looks like a text message from your doctor saying he can't stop crying.
Tuesday November 27,
2012
Tags #gadgets, #laziness, #mobile (cell) phones, #smartphone business, #strangles, #lazy
Transcript
CEO: We're going into the smartphone business. Smartphones are basically gadgets, and we already make gadgets, so how hard could it be? Dilbert: If you strangle me now, I promise I won't resist. Boss: That sounds lazy.
Monday November 26,
2012
Tags #happiness, #work ethic, #busy work, #cheerful, #form of insanity, #worthless assignments, #professional help, #psychology
Transcript
Asok: I completed the busywork you assigned to me and I'm still cheerful! I don't know how I do it. I really don't. I assume it's a form of insanity. Do you have more worthless assignments I could do before I seek professional help? Boss: Yup.
Monday September 10,
2012
Tags #dating, #mobile (cell) phones, #humiliation, #disrespect, #company, #relationships, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you mind if i check something on my phone? Woman: Why would I mind the humiliation and disrespect of being with a man who prefers the company of his phone? Dilbert: That's the sort of attitude that makes you finish second to my phone.