Moron Comic Strips - Page 3
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67 Results for Moron
View 21 - 30 results for moron comic strips. Discover the best "Moron" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday May 24,
2012
Tags dueling, announcing stupid, dumbest person, history, moron, new cubicle, education
Transcript
Loud Howard meets Topper Coworker: I did something stupid today!!! Topper: That's nothing. I'm the dumbest person in the history of the universe!!! Together: I'm a moron!!! Dilbert: I need a new cubicle.
Tuesday April 10,
2012
Tags calendars, desk, meails, meetings, padtes, schdeules, secretary, coordinates
Transcript
Boss: I want you to work from home for two days per week to reduce our carbon footprint. Employee: Nooooo! My wife and three small children are in that house. They're always mean to me. Boss: How bad could it be? Employee: Let me put it this way: I'm sitting in an egg carton and talking to a moron, and this is better.
Monday April 09,
2012
Tags Family, work from home, 2 days err week, reduce carbon foorprint, wife, small children, egg carton, talking to moron, relationships
Transcript
Boss: I want you to work from home for two days per week to reduce our carbon footprint. Employee: Nooooo! My wife and three small children are in that house. They're always mean to me. Boss: How bad could it be? Employee: Let me put it this way: I'm sitting in an egg carton and talking to a moron, and this is better.
Tuesday March 15,
2011
Tags gloating, meetings, idea, rejected idea, being impractical, take credit, noticing, implied your a moron, appreciated
Transcript
Coworker says, "I thought of your idea a year ago and rejected it for being impractical." Dilbert says, "Did you just take credit for my idea and diss it at the same time?" Coworker says, "Thanks for noticing." The Boss says, "He also cleverly implied that you're a moron." Coworker says, "It feels good to be appreciated!"
Wednesday December 29,
2010
Tags avoid ansering, emails, unhelpful moron, poorly designed robot, terminate ecompnay, robot
Transcript
Alice says, "I've noticed that whenever I ask you a specific question by email, you avoid answering it." Alice says, "You're either an unhelpful moron or a poorly designed robot sent from the future to terminate our company." Dilbert says, "How did you know it was a robot?" Alice says, "I didn't."
Sunday July 11,
2010
Tags meeting, change, communicate, clear, moron, mock, tease, fuh, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "A successful transformation requires employees to feel ownership for the change." Alice says, "Change? What change?" Dilbert says, "Is there something we don't know?" The Boss says, "It's important that everyone has clear roles and responsibilities." Alice says, "What are you trying to tell us? Should we stop working on our projects?" The Boss says, "I'll keep you engaged and energized with my clear communication." The Boss says, "And as your leader, I will role-model the desired change." Alice says, "If he's our role model, I guess we need to act like morons who can't communicate." The Boss thinks, "I need new people." FUH FUH FUH FUH FUH FUH
Monday June 21,
2010
Tags assignment, moron, yell, grab tie, upset
Transcript
Dilbert says, "?And I'll need all of that by tomorrow." Coworker says, "No problem. I'll get right on it." Dilbert says, "This is a bad sign. If you were even a little bit competent you would be overloaded with work." Dilbert says, "Gaaa!!! I'm putting my trust in a moron!" Coworker says, "Wow. You got there fast."
Sunday December 27,
2009
Tags meeting, brilliant, moron, appearance, superficial, beard, silent, Funny, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "I invited silent Gary to help us decide on a technology direction." The Boss says, "We think he's a genius because he has a beard and he never speaks." The Boss says, "Gary, do you think we should use open source software for our support platform?" The Boss says, "Here it comes. He's rubbing his beard and giving me creepy eye contact." THe Boss says, "I detect a slight hint of disgust. It means Gary hates the idea! The Boss says, "Yes, it's all so obvious now. This is the worst idea in the history of mankind." The Boss says, "THe meeting is over. Silent Gary has spoken." Dilbert says, "You're actually a moron, aren't you?" Gary says, "Don't ruin this for me."
Wednesday July 15,
2009
Tags writing, newsletter, reading, ridicule, Family, annoyed
Transcript
Tina says, "I've been asked to chronicle your rise to management for the company newsletter." Tina says, "So far, I have the story of how your father was a barrel-shaped moron who married a blind woman." Tina says, "But it could have been the other way around. I'm mostly guessing." The boss says, "Lucky guess."
Monday February 11,
2008
Tags sensitive material, interoffice, topsecret, moron, security department, slap hard, run fast
Transcript
Ted: Your most sensitive materials should always be sent in an interoffice envelope marked 'top secret. Dilbert: Are you a moron who works in our security department, or an industrial spy who is too lazy to look through lots of envelopes? The boss: Our security guys don't slap that hard or run that fast.

