Page Numbers Comic Strips - Page 3

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137 Results for Page Numbers

View 21 - 30 results for page numbers comic strips. Discover the best "Page Numbers" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2013's comic on:


Tags #annoyance, #money, #budget estimate, #project, #one billion dollars, #unreasonable

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Boss: I need a budget estimate for your project. Dilbert: One billion dollars. Boss: That doesn't sound reasonable. Dilbert: I'll shout numbers and you can stop me when one sounds reasonable. Boss: Please stop being you. Dilbert: Eleven!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 24, 2013's comic on:


Tags #apathy, #work ethic, #new revisions, #work, #meaning

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Carol: Ignore the page revisions I send out ten minutes ago. Your boss revised them again. Dilbert: Can I ignore the new revisions, too? I'm only asking because that was my plan. Carol: Thank you for removing the last shred of meaning from my work. Dilbert: It's what I do.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 07, 2013's comic on:


Tags #obliviousness, #work ethic, #lawyer, #60 page contract, #amendements, #900 contracts, #tax law, #17 managers, #good leaders, #standards, #legal

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Boss: Our lawyer sent over a sixty-page contract renewal that I need you to review. Make sure you compare it to the original contract and all six or seven amendments. Dilbert: Are there six or... seven? Boss: No one really knows. Check out our other nine hundred contracts to make sure this one doesn't violate any of those. Keep in mind our five-year strategic plan and all likely changes to tax law. Then get buy-in from the seventeen managers who hate my guts and will take it out on you. By tomorrow. Good leaders set high standards.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 24, 2013's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #era, #original signature, #signatures, #time machine, #telegraph system

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Coworker: You'll need to mail me the original signature page after everyone signs it. Dilbert: No problem. I'll use my time machine to go back to an era in which mailing original signatures made some kind of sense. I wonder if there will ever be a way to send images over the telegraph system.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 31, 2013's comic on:


Tags #frustration, #questioning, #navigation button, #top of page, #idea people, #difficult, #people not answering

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Dilbert: Would it be better with the navigation button at the top of the page? Coworker: I can make that change. Dilbert: I know you can make the change. I'm asking if you agree it would be a good idea. Coworker: It's no problem to move buttons. Dilbert: But is it a good idea? Coworker: I can have it done in ten minutes. Dilbert: But should we do it at all? Coworker: Whatever you want. Dilbert: That is not an answer! Forget it! I'm going to tell your boss you're difficult to work with. Asok: When will you move the button. Coworker: As soon as it's my idea.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 12, 2013's comic on:


Tags #exploitation, #work ethic, #territorial mud, #web page, #forced labor camps, #current job, #capture canadian

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Elbonian: Halt! You have entered the territorial mud of North Elbonia! I'll text you a link to a web page about our forced labor camps. You might like them. Dilbert: This looks better than my current job. Elbonian: No rush, but I have an appointment to capture a Canadian at eleven.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2013's comic on:


Tags #dog, #facebook, #facebook page, #internet & world wide web, #linkedin, #stocks, #twitter, #websites, #work ethic, #working from home, #distractions, #animals

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Dilbert: I'm working at home today. It will be as if we're co-workers. Dogbert: Ugh. This madness must stop! You should check your Facebook page to see what's new. You should check Twitter. Dilbert: I'm almost finished with Facebook. Dogbert: Did you get my LinkedIn request? Dilbert: I'll check. Dogbert: I send you some links to funny websites. Dilbert: Cool! I just spent ten hours at my computer and I can't remember why I was sitting there in the first place. Dogbert: You were going to check your stocks. Dilbert: Okay. That sounds right. Two Hours Later. Two Hours Later. Two Hours Later.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 2012's comic on:


Tags #confusing, #multiple pages, #public speaking, #real words, #small text, #unpersuasive, #computer, #desk, #no one can read, #technology

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Dilbert: Do you want me to put the chart on one page, which would make the text too small for you to see? Or do you prefer a multiple-page approach that is confusing and unpersuasive? Boss: It's probably better if no one can read it. Dilbert: I won't bother using real words.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 2012's comic on:


Tags #page layout, #ugly, #ugly cubicle, #aesthetics, #barber, #parents, #trample

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Dilbert: Your page layout is ugly. Tina: Whose fault is that? I work in an ugly cubicle surrounded by ugly people. You trample on my sense of aesthetics and expect me to be unaffected? Dilbert: So... it's my fault? Tina: You, your parents, your barber, and whoever dresses you.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 06, 2011's comic on:


Tags #interviews, #suspicion, #job interview, #brand online, #blog, #tweets, #facebook, #credit, #criminal record, #transcripts, #refrences, #external stuff, #attitude, #yrine test, #dna test, #tanning bed, #mri, #psychology

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Job interview Boss: I researched your personal brand online. Man: My what? Boss: I looked at your blog, your Tweets, an your Facebook page. I Googled your name and followed every link. I checked your credit, criminal record, school transcripts, and references. But that's just the external stuff. Man: Exactly. It's my attitude that counts! Boss: No. I mean I also have the results of your urine test. Oh, and apparently some of your sample landed in a DNA test kit. And that tanning bed you used last week was actually an MRI. How's your attitude now? Man: Harder to fake.