Pointless Question Comic Strips - Page 3
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287 Results for Pointless Question
View 21 - 30 results for pointless question comic strips. Discover the best "Pointless Question" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday March 15,
2019
Press Release
Tags #Dilbert, #boss, #unethical, #scientists, #press, #question, #overkill
Transcript
Dilbert: The unethical scientist we hired to support our product claims started today. Boss: Write a press release that says whatever we want him to say and put his name on it. Dilbert: Should we show it to him? Boss: That feels like overkill.
Saturday February 16,
2019
Dumb Questions
Tags #boss, #insults, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #questions, #sarcasm
Transcript
Dilbert: Let's brainstorm, and remember, there are no dumb questions, only dumb bosses. Boss: Was that necessary? Dilbert: I stand corrected: There is at least one dumb question.
Sunday December 09,
2018
Tags #communication, #frustrated, #office, #office workers, #talking
Transcript
Dilbert: Did Alice talk to you about the cost estimates? Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I can't hear you. Ted: Mumble mumble!!! Dilbert: Now you're just mumbling louder. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: Maybe you could turn toward me when you mumble and I can try to read your lips. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I'm getting something about grapes, windshields, asthma, and blockchain. Ted: I didn't say any of those things. Dilbert: Okay. I understood that sentence. Now answer my question the same way. Ted: Mumble mumble.
Saturday October 13,
2018
Dogbert The Sociopath
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #test, #sociopath, #question, #lost, #interest, #end, #conversation
Transcript
Dogbert: I took a test to find out if I'm a sociopath. I got every question right. Dilbert: And by "right," you mean...? Dogbert: I already lost interest in your end of the conversation.
Wednesday October 10,
2018
Dogbert The Insultant
Tags #Dogbert, #business, #insultant, #journal, #week, #fat, #stupid, #question, #list
Transcript
Dogbert the business insultant. Dogbert: Make a journal of everything you do for a week. Then stop doing everything that is on your list because it's making you fat and stupid. The Boss: I have some questions. Dogbert: Add "asks questions" to your list.
Sunday September 30,
2018
Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #co-workers, #phone calls, #cubicle, #breaks, #flow, #Food, #smells, #break, #room, #pretending, #thermostat
Transcript
Dilbert: My co-workers make it impossible to work. I hear every one of their phone calls. It's maddening. When they walk past my cubicle it breaks my flow. And don't get me started about the food smells coming from the break room. They ask me one dumb question after another. I don't know who keeps turning up the thermostat. But it's too hot to think. The Boss: Would it help if I threaten to fire you? Dilbert: It's worth a try I'll be in my cubicle pretending to work.
Saturday August 25,
2018
Dilbert Consults His Bumper Stickers
Tags #ceo, #Dilbert, #government regulations, #marketing, #question authority
Transcript
CEO: Government regulations prevent us from marketing our products the way we want. What should we do? Dilbert: I'll consult my bundle of bumper stickers for some guidance. "Question authority." CEO: How did you get so smart?
Saturday June 23,
2018
How Dare You
Tags #offended, #offense, #accusation, #strategy
Transcript
Wally: My new defense against every accusation is to be offended by the question. Dilbert: That works? Wally: Depends how hard I sell it. Woman: Why haven't you returned any of my emails? Wally: How dare you!
Friday June 22,
2018
Wally's Best Play
Tags #excuses, #laziness, #work ethic, #deadline
Transcript
Wally: There are many, many reasons why my project is late and over budget. Boss: Do any of those reasons not involve your incompetence and sloth? Wally: I think my best play here is to be offended by the question.
Wednesday June 13,
2018
Hard Work Is The Key To Success
Tags #Advice, #manager, #self-interest, #motivation
Transcript
Asok: What is the key to success? Boss: Hard work! Asok: Is it a coincidence that your advice for me corresponds to your self-interest? Boss: My other advice is never question authority.