Prevent Success Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

194 Results for Prevent Success

View 21 - 30 results for prevent success comic strips. Discover the best "Prevent Success" comics from Dilbert.com.

Hard Work Is The Key

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hard Work Is The Key - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Advice, #office, #office workers, #success, #difficult

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The key to your personal success is hard work. Dilbert: Was it hard for you to learn that? Boss: No, it was easy. Dilbert: Do you mind if I get my advice from someone who worked it at harder?

No Recognisiton

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Recognisiton - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #addiction, #office workers, #social media, #video games, #expectations

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Video games and social media have made me addicted to artificial success. But here in the real world, I do not receive the recognition I so crave. Dilbert: That's because all you do is play video games and use social media. Man: See? I'm getting nothing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #decision, #executives, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #success, #manipulation

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Profits have increased thirty percent under my leadership. Dilbert: Snort. CEO: What? Dilbert: All you do is pick the best plans from the options we show you. CEO: Exactly, and I pick the best plan every time. Dilbert: That's because we only show you the best plans compared to the worst plans we can think of. We control every decision you make by manipulating your perception of the options. CEO: We need to fix that. Dilbert: How do you fix something that isn't broken?

Ai Can Control Minds

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ai Can Control Minds - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #control, #intelligence, #office workers, #robot, #technology, #humans

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: We've developed an A.I. with such strong persuasion skills it can control human minds. Dilbert: Obviously, we have to stop the project and destroy all of the code to prevent it from spreading. Man: The A.I. says I need to ignore you.

Wally Mentors To Death

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Mentors To Death - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #asok, #Wally, #successful, #definition, #minimum, #alive, #employed, #comas, #ruling

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Have you ever mentored anyone who went on to be successful? Wally: Depends on your definition of success. Asok: Well, at minimum, they'd need to be alive and gainfully employed. Wally: What's your ruling on comas?

Dilbert Consults His Bumper Stickers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Consults His Bumper Stickers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceo, #Dilbert, #government regulations, #marketing, #question authority

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Government regulations prevent us from marketing our products the way we want. What should we do? Dilbert: I'll consult my bundle of bumper stickers for some guidance. "Question authority." CEO: How did you get so smart?

Hard Work Is The Key To Success

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hard Work Is The Key To Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Advice, #manager, #self-interest, #motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: What is the key to success? Boss: Hard work! Asok: Is it a coincidence that your advice for me corresponds to your self-interest? Boss: My other advice is never question authority.

Asking Successful People For Advice

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asking Successful People For Advice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #success, #Advice, #ambition

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Every time I ask a successful person for career advice, I get a different answer. Carol: My plan for success is to lull my boss into a fatal accident and take over his identity. Asok: I'm not asking unsuccessful people for advice. Carol: Is that how you talk to your future boss?

Wally Teaches Success

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Teaches Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #success, #luck, #money, #winning, #mentor, #Advice

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Can you mentor me on how to be successful? Wally: Your best strategy is a combination of lying and being related to rich people. Asok: What is the second-best strategy? Wally: Crime is second. Winning a lottery is third.

No Path To Success

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Path To Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #proof, #guilt, #exoneration, #accusation, #negative

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I emailed you proof that you were wrong when you accused me of deleting Alice's project files. Boss: Now I hate you for always needing to be right. Dilbert: I don't see a path to success here. Boss: Your negativity is like a cancer in the workplace.