Renting Expensive Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

42 Results for Renting Expensive

View 21 - 30 results for renting expensive comic strips. Discover the best "Renting Expensive" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags company policy, least expensive flight, 17 connecting flights, elbonain prison, dressed as a ballerina, desecrate monument

View Transcript

Transcript

"Per company policy, I got you the least expensive flight available." "Your trip will have 17 connecting flights and you're required to spend at least one night 'in an Elbonian prison, dressed as a ballerina.'" "How much would I have to desecrate a national monument to get one night in jail?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags 400 per hour, expensive, ball rolling, process using, recommendations

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Mister Dogbert has agreed to consult for $400 per hour. "I know it's expensive but you get what you pay for." "Let's get the ball rolling." "My first question is: what process will you be using to arrive at your recommendations?" Dogbert: "a..." "very...slow one..."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags evil director, human resources, cubicles, open plan, special class, transition, invisible walls, business

View Transcript

Transcript

CAtbert: Evil director of human resources Catbert: cubicles are too expensive. we're moving to an open plan, You'll attend a special classy to ease your transition. Wally: its like he's in a cubicle with invisible walls!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags can't buy happiness, expensive possessions, pople envious, tarde happiness for money, whacked

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: "Bob, remember that money can't buy happiness." Bob: "But it can buy expensive possessions that make other people envious, and that feels just as good." Dogbert: "And you can pay to have people whacked." Bob: "Can I trade my happiness for some money?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags plant watering service, less expensive one, plastic plants

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "I fired our plant-watering service and hired a less expensive one." The Boss continues, "That's the sort of leadership that will turn this company around." Wally asks, "Were we doing well?" Dilbert says, "Our plants are plastic."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags elbonians, buy influence, vote, Politics

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: P.R. for Elbonia. Dogbert is meeting with two Elbonians. Dogbert says, "You need to buy influence in Washington." Dogbert continues, "It sounds expensive, but it's a lot more affordable than you'd think." An Elbonian stands outside of a building in Washington D.C. He stops a politician and asks, "Gum?" The politician responds, "You got my vote!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags funding, continuous harping, expensive consultant, analyze budget, chaos, complexity, simulations

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches and says, "In response to your continuous harping about not having enough funding.." The Boss is joined by another man. The Boss continues, "I hired an expensive consultant to analyze your budget." The consultant says to Dilbert, "I'll have to run some chaos and complexity simulations, but it looks as if you need more money."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags expansive projects, failed, drink coffee, economic basis, watch and learn

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to The Boss, "Over the past year, most of my coworkers have managed expensive projects that failed." Wally continues, "I've done nothing but drink coffee. So on an economic basis, that makes me your top performer." Wally takes a sip of coffee and says, "Watch and learn."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags least expensive vendor, requirements, change mid project, lowest bid, fired later, fired mid project, outplacement service, every sale

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is meeting with a business associate. The business associate says, "We're the least expensive vendor unless your requirements change mid- project." Dilbert responds, "So... I'll get fired if I don't select the lowest bid, or I'll be fired later when the bills for change orders pour in." Dilbert says, "I prefer to be fired mid-project." The business associate replies, "We offer outplacement service with every sale."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags salesman, questions, best running shoe, sneakers are sneakers, far superior, expensive ones

View Transcript

Transcript

SALE: DIlbert is standing in a shoe store looking around. Alan, a salesman from behind asks, "Do you have any questions?" Dilbert turns and asks, "What's your best running shoe?" The salesman replies, "They're all the same. Sneakers are sneakers." The store manager interrupts, "Alan, may I have a word with you?" Dilbert continues to inspect the shoes as the manager and salesman are conferencing in the back. The salesman returns and says, "The expensive sneakers are far superior." Dilbert replies, "I'll take them!" The salesman thinks, "I feel like I'm clubbing a baby seal." Dilbert is holding up a sneaker and asks, "Will these work with my old socks?"