Second Task Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

160 Results for Second Task

View 21 - 30 results for second task comic strips. Discover the best "Second Task" comics from Dilbert.com.

Replacing Robot Head

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Replacing Robot Head - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #machines, #rights, #robot, #technology, #survival, #suffering, #apathy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I've been asked to replace your head. Robot: Um... what's the survival rate for this operation? Dilbert: No one cares. Robot: I'll need a second opinion. Wally: I don't care either.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #listening, #small talk

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: How's work? Dilbert: Well, since you asked... it's like being trapped in a garbage compactor and no one can hear me scream. All my hopes and dreams have died, along with my immune system and my dignity. The only thing keeping me alive is that food tastes good. I tried to escape into my imagination, but I learned I don't have one. My life has no meaning. Each second is a slow-motion ordeal. Why do I get the feeling you weren't listening to any of that? Boss:My day was good too.

It Sounded Like Feng Shui

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
It Sounded Like Feng Shui - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers, #obliviousness, #distraction, #attention

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why haven't you finished writing the software? Dilbert: Because each of your interruptions took me out of the zone and turned a simple task into a nightmare. Catbert: What did he mean by that? Boss: It sounded like some sort of feng shui.

Brain Fragments

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brain Fragments - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bored, #boredom, #health, #mundane

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need to take an extended medical leave to recover from a boredom-related injury at work. You gave ma a task so boring that my brain tried to escape through my lower gastrointestinal tract. Boss: I'm sure it wasn't that bad. Dilbert: I found brain fragments in my pants.

Brain Trapping

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brain Trapping - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boredom, #bored, #mundane

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Don't get too close. He's brain-trapping. Asok: What? Wally: He's doing a task so boring that he has to cover his ear holes so his brain won't try to escape. There's no way for it to get out now. Asok: Did he just get taller?

Brain Escapes Ear Holes

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brain Escapes Ear Holes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bored, #boredom, #brain, #menial

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to research this. Dilbert: Uh-oh. This task is so boring that I"m worried my brain will try to escape out of my ear holes. Boss: That's not a real thing, is it? Dilbert: Ow! It's starting!

Wally's Work Life Balance

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Work Life Balance - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #excuse

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I can't do your urgent task because I'm on deadline for my boss. I can't meet your deadline because I have an urgent task from a co-worker. I finally figured out the whole "work-life balance" thing.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #correction, #correcting, #freak out, #anger, #tress, #Advice, #eavesdropping, #awkward, #temper

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: What's the best way to invest these days? Boss: Penny stocks are the best value because they only cost a penny. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I hate over hearing bad advice! Boss: If I were you, I"d take out a second mortgage and load up. Dilbert; I don't want to get involved, but I'll feel bad if I don't. Boss: You'll get reliable stock-picking advice from strangers on television. Dilbert: Run! Cover your ears and run! If it makes you feel any less awkward, I don't now what to do now, either.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #internet, #viral video, #awkward, #interaction, #insult, #cell phone, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Did you see the viral video of the kitten riding the zebra? Dilbert: I know where this is heading and I don't like it. You're going to spend the next ten minutes looking for that video on your phone while we wait. Boss: It will only take a second. Dilbert: And so it begins. Boss: Here it is. No, wait. Dang. Wrong one. Okay, here it is. Oops, no, wrong one. Narrator: Ten minutes later. Boss: What do you think? Dilbert: I can't see it because you keep moving. Boss: I would let you hold it, but I don't want your germs on my phone. Dilbert: There are a lot of unsatisfying parts to this interaction. Wally: Now my coffee is cold.

Duplicating Effort

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Duplicating Effort - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #management, #productivity, #absent mindedness, #forgetful, #duplicate

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Great update, Ted. Now let's hear what Dilbert did this week. Dilbert: I unnecessarily duplicated Ted's work because you forgot you asked bot of us to do the same task. Boss: And how about Alice? Alice: You're three for three.