Someone Less Fortunate Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

577 Results for Someone Less Fortunate

View 21 - 30 results for someone less fortunate comic strips. Discover the best "Someone Less Fortunate" comics from Dilbert.com.

Self Actualization

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Self Actualization - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #managers & supervisors, #business, #work, #talk, #listen, #self-actualized

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i work every day, and yet i am not feeling completely self-actualized. boss: what's that mean? dilbert: i don't know. it's something i heard. boss: why are we even talking about it? dilbert: because the more i talk, the less i have to listen to you.

Donating To Politicians

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Donating To Politicians - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #Politics, #government, #campaign, #bribe, #faith, #drones, #guns, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert, boss and alice at table boss: i donated to a few campaigns, and coincidentally a law changed that i wanted changed. now it's legal for us to sell drones that are armed with machine guns. dilbert: i've never had less faith in my government. boss: i also got us a tax break.

Illegal To Sell Armed Drones

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Illegal To Sell Armed Drones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #illegal, #armed, #drones, #private, #citizens, #sell, #business, #technology, #bribe, #law

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i just learned it's illegal to sell armed drones to private citizens. how many orders did we get since we started selling them this morning? dilbert: seventy million. boss: i'll look into bribing someone to change the law.

Brain Fog

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Brain Fog - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #co-workers, #business, #health, #meds, #i.q., #handsome, #name

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i have brain fog from the meds i took last night. my i.q. is down by 50%, but i make up for it by being handsome. alice: sounds more like a 75% situation. dilbert: now, can someone remind me of my name?

Employee Engagement Survey

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Employee Engagement Survey - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #underpay, #senior, #management, #accurate, #information, #engagement, #survey, #important, #underpaid

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: all out the employee engagement survey and make sure you lie like crazy. i don't want any accurate information to bubble up to senior management. dilbert: i've never felt less important. boss: good. that's why i can underpay you.

Saying You Are Dumb

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Saying You Are Dumb  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #job, #change, #technology, #dumb, #imply, #product

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert's tech support ted: i can't figure out how to use your product. what should i do? dogbert: i recommend changing jobs to something less challenging. ted: are you saying i'm dumb? dogbert's once from phone: no. no. no. i'm only implying it.

Humans Getting Wiser

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Humans Getting Wiser - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #psychology, #humans, #dumb, #selfish, #wise, #interact, #people

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: the more i interact with people, the less i like them. i can't tell if i'm getting wiser or humans are becoming dumber and more selfish. dogbert: humans couldn't get any dumber or more selfish. dilbert: so, you're saying i'm getting wiser?

Boss Helps

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Helps - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #project, #deadline, #interruption, #business, #new, #task, #priority

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: why isn't your project done yet? dilbert: because every time i walk past your office you give me three new tasks and tell men they are my highest priority. boss: i was hoping you didn't know why. dilbert: hire someone dumber next time.

Help Me With Something

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Help Me With Something - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office workers, #compensation, #system, #incentive, #budget, #limit, #smart, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

male office worker: can you help me with something? dilbert: no, our employee compensation system incentivizes me to let you fail so i can lay claim to a larger share of our limited budget for raises. maybe you could ask someone who is less aware. office worker: none of them are smart enough to help.

Dark Matter And Lights

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dark Matter And Lights - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #philosophy, #world, #dark, #matter, #light

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: did you know that 85% of the matter in the world is dark matter, and we don't even know what dark matter is? boss: i know what it is dilbert: you do? boss: it's when the lights are off. - duh. dilbert: i'm going to go talk to someone else now.