Topper Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

40 Results for Topper

View 21 - 30 results for topper comic strips. Discover the best "Topper" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #story, #topping, #bragging, #ridiculous, #lying, #annoyed

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Alice says, "I went for a long walk yesterday." Topper says, "That's nothing." Topper says, "My thighs are so strong that I'm afraid to jump rope when the sun is directly overhead." Alice says, "You're full of beans." Man says, "Exactly. That's how I achieve escape velocity."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bragging, #birth, #doubtful, #editing, #wikipedia, #lying

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Carol says, "My first baby weighed 12 pounds. I gave birth in the cap of a stolen backhoe." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I once passed a gallstone so big that it became secretary of labor in the Clinton administration." Carol says, "I find that hard to believe." Topper says, "Give me ten minutes and then check wikipedia."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bragging, #saving, #money, #talking, #ridiculous

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Dilbert says, "I'm painting my own house to save money." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I had spider glands trasplanted into my body so I can make my own silk garments." Dilbert says, "That doesn't seem?" Topper says, "Who wants mittens?!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #economy, #money, #investments, #topping, #comparing, #proud, #bragging

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Dilbert says, "Gaaa! My stocks are down 70%!" Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "Today I discovered that my house is insulated with cheese." Dilbert says, "Gouda?" Topper says, "Grated."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #history, #lying, #pride, #selfishness, #worried, #recession, #frightening, #crimean war, #cold stench, #death, #use moisturizer, #old enough, #experience, #education, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Asok says, "This recession frightens me." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "During the Crimean war, all I had to eat was the cold stench of death!" Asok says, "You don't seem old enough to?" Topper says, "I use moisturizer!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bragging, #rudeness, #selfishness, #stories, #goat cistume, #donated organs, #hollow torso, #backpack, #zipper, #family of squirrels

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Returns Dilbert says, "I dreamed I was wearing a goat costume." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I donated all of my organs to sick people. Now I use my hollow torso like a backpack." "Dilbert says, "And I tried to go on a date." Topper says, "See my zipper? I took in a family of squirrels!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #co worker, #tired, #dead, #died, #afterlife, #zombie, #alive again, #pictures in heaven, #eyes closed

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Dilbert: I didn't get much sleep last night. Ted: That's nothing. I haven't slept in a month. Dilbert: Wouldn't that kill you? Ted: It did, but that's nothing. I spent a week in the afterlife, then I returned to this world as a zombie. I taught myself homeopathy and discovered a cure for zombies. Now I'm alive again. Please be done...Please be done...Please be done... I took pictures of heaven. Alice: Gaaa!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper "My first baby weighed 11 pounds." "That's nothing." "I once passed a kidney stone that was the size of a small horse." "I find that hard to believe." "That kidney stone went on to win the Kentucky Derby!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Return of Topper "Then we started taking RPG fire from a rooftop." "That's nothing." "I strangled 900 insurgents with my bare hands." "That seems unlikely." "That's what the first 600 said."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper "I had to carry over three weeks of vacation." "That's nothing!" "I carried over so much time that they had to create a new month and name it after me!" "Shut your pie hole!" "It looks as if someone is having a bad topperuary."