Tree Growth Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

69 Results for Tree Growth

View 21 - 30 results for tree growth comic strips. Discover the best "Tree Growth" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"When I was a kid, we didn't have any cell phones, iPods, video games, or computers." "I played outside. My only toy was tree bark." "Were you raised by squirrels?" "No, I'm just mature."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Now that I know your resume was embellished, you need to talk to the VP of Human Resources." "Are you going to fire me?" "Nah. I'll let you in on a little secret." "I'm the ficus tree that used to be in the lobby."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

"Gaaa! You put your gum on this recyclable waste material!!!" "How do you like it in your hair? Huh? Not so funny now is it, tree-killer!" "The worst part is that I envy him for being passionate about his job."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

View Transcript

Transcript

I just saw a study that says the dull appearance of my cubicle is probably inhibiting the growth of neurons in my brain! "Try sitting there for a few hours and then tell me if you feel any different." "Now I can't remember what I was complaining about."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interview candidate, #isn't too old, #illegal ask, #telltale signs, #explosive ear hair

View Transcript

Transcript

Interview this candidate and make sure he isn't too old. "It's illegal to ask his age." "Just stall until you see the telltale signs of E.E.H.G." "E.E.H.G.?" "Explosive ear hair growth." "Hmm. No wrinkles. But maybe he uses moisturizers and stays out of the sun." "Wait...wait..." "Can't...hold out any...longer." "GAAA!!! Look away! Look away!" "Ha!" "Then I waited and waited...What?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #plant, #cucbilce, #coffeedregs, #staus reprts, #decaf, #tree

View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, what are you feeding the plant outside your cubicle?" "It's a mulch of coffee dregs and my shredded status reports." "You might want to switch to decaf."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #journal, #personal growth, #write in journal, #felt a little

View Transcript

Transcript

Keep a journal of everything you do. That way you'll know where you need help. "Now I am writing in my journal. I am still writing in my journal. Now I am writing about writing in my journal." "Ooh. I think I felt a little personal growth there."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #optimism, #blah blah, #record growth, #not litening, #inappropriate

View Transcript

Transcript

"Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." "I wasn't listening. I'll try some optimism. That works in every situation." "I hope we'll see record growth!" "In my prostate?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #viosnary executives, #block of wood, #foresee good numbers, #new glasses

View Transcript

Transcript

"Optometrist for Visionary Executives" "Look through this block of wood." "Is this better or worse?" "Better." "I forsee forty quarters of growth." "Hey, new glasses?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss's office, #employee, #exciting challenges, #fertilized plant, #hard work done, #tree grows

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: "I worked nights and weekends to finish my project ahead of schedule." The Boss: "Good. Here's more work." Asok: "I don't understand. Am I being punished for working hard?" The Boss: "No, you're being rewarded with exciting new challenges." Asok: "Why does the plant grow faster when you say things like that?" The Boss: "No reason." "Stop that!" "Anyway, your annual performance review will award your hard work." Wally: That is one fertilized plant