Vacation Days Comic Strips - Page 3

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254 Results for Vacation Days

View 21 - 30 results for vacation days comic strips. Discover the best "Vacation Days" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert Throws Penalty Flag

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Dogbert Throws Penalty Flag - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice, the boss, asok, Wally, Dilbert, accomplish, addicted, apps, fortnite, slept, losers, podcast

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Alice: I accomplished nothing this week because I'm addicted to apps on my phone. I haven't slept in three days because of my "Fortnite" habit. The Boss: What about the rest of you losers? Asok: Shhh. I got a one-ear podcast going here.

Virtual Reality

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Virtual Reality - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Wally, days, virtual, trained, hospital, designer, bed, lazy

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Dilbert: After spending three great days in virtual reality, I accidentally trained myself to hate actual reality. Wally: What if this reality is actually another virtual reality, and you're really in a hospital bed somewhere? Dilbert: What kind of designer would make a reality with you in it? Wally: A lazy one.

Present Company Excluded

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Present Company Excluded - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, carol, virtual, human, organic, cheated, present, excluded, problem

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Dilbert: I just spent three days using virtual reality with no human contact whatsoever. Now every time I interact with an organic human, I feel cheated. Carol: Present company excluded? Dilbert: Here's another problem I never have in virtual reality.

Wally Covers For Alice

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Wally Covers For Alice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice, heat, thousand suns, vacation, Wally

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Alice: I'm back from vacation. Did you have any problems covering for me? Wally: No problem at all I saved all of your work for when you got back. Alice: I hate you with the heat of a thousand suns! Wally: How was your vacation? Was it relaxing?

Boss Comes To Work Sick

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Boss Comes To Work Sick  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sick, sickness, illness, contagious, sick days, medical

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Boss: I have to warn you-- I have a fever and I'm tripping on cold medicine. Alice: Thank you for coming to work and infecting all of us, you selfish, addle-brained plague rat. Boss: I was going for "courageous." Dilbert: Do Wally first, so I can watch him spasm.

Boss Ends Neural Interface

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Boss Ends Neural Interface  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mind control, technology, invention, amnesia, forgetting, memory loss

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Dilbert: We removed the neural interface to your brain. Do you remember anything we made you do? Boss: No, not a thing. Dilbert: That's probably for the best. Boss: Did I break any laws? Alice: Not according to the cop you dated for three days.

Dogbert's Negotiating Class

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Dogbert's Negotiating Class - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags negotiating, deception, sales, manipulation, deal, business

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Boss: I approved your request to take a negotiating class. Dilbert: Why did you change your mind? Boss: The instructor offered a great deal. Narrator: Earlier that day. Dogbert: Would you like to spend other people's money to get rid of Dilbert for a few days? Boss: Sold!

Software Is Never Finished

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Software Is Never Finished  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers, deadline, guidance, lying

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Boss: Is the software finished? Dilbert: Software is never finished. Boss: Did you fix all of the bugs? Dilbert: There's no way to know. Boss: I can't manage you if you don't learn to lie. Dilbert: Okay, the software will be perfect in 2.3 days.

Wally Takes Decaf Vacations

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Wally Takes Decaf Vacations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags vacation, caffeine, coffee

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Alice: I've never seen you take a vacation. Wally: I take mental vacations. All I do is switch to decaf. After a few hours, I can't remember what country I'm in. Alice: Sounds dumb. Is the any downside? Wally: The locals could be friendlier.

Estimate Of Timeline

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Estimate Of Timeline - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, deadline, goals, ultimatum

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Boss: How fast can you fix the bug? Dilbert: I won't know until I dig in. Boss: Give me a random guess and I promise I won't hold you to it. Dilbert: Okay, three days. Boss: Now write that into your goals and get it done in three days or else. Dilbert: Why do I keep falling for that?!!!