Women Desries Comic Strips - Page 3
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Boss: The Nobel Prize Committee nominated you for your block of wood that imitates human intelligence? I wonder what the block of wood thinks about that. Wally: It's in a bad mood and not talking. Boss: Did you model that thing after my wife? Wally: Now you've insulted it.
Tina: As your work wife, I have some constructive criticism for you. Dilbert: Great. Tina: You'd be more attractive if you were taller, I just realized I don't know the difference between constructive criticism and the regular kind.
Dilbert: Alice, I am breaking up with you as my work wife. Tina complains less and she sends me on fewer errands, so I choose her. Alice: What's your game? Tina: I'm running a bait-and-switch on him.
Tina: I'm in the market for a "work husband." Do you have a "work wife" yet? Dilbert: I'm not sure. Alice criticized me a lot. Does that count? Tina: That's all I wanted to do, too. Dilbert: Okay, but don't let Alice find out.
Dilbert: My date lasted 53 minutes. Dogbert: That's your longest yet. Was she trapped in any way, such as under rubble? Dilbert: Nope! Dogbert: Wow. How'd you do it? Dilbert: I didn't talk for the first 49 minutes.
Dilbert: I don't know what to do about my bad posture. Dogbert: Try yoga. Dilbert: Ooh, good idea. That will also improve my odds of meeting an attractive yoga-loving woman. Man: That was my plan too, but the full-stack guys gut here early and scared away the yoga women.
Boss: Why do all of the women I hire quit within the first week? Wally: I'm guessing they have high standards, or something along those lines. Boss: They seem to quit soon after they meet you. Wally: Hypothesis confirmed.
Boss: What did you say to my daughter's class about stem careers? Wally: I told the boys to pursue restaurant work because it's a better way to meet women. Boss: That's messed up. Wally: You said you want gender balance, and now you have it.