Work For Comapny Comic Strips - Page 3
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1000 Results for Work For Comapny
View 21 - 30 results for work for comapny comic strips. Discover the best "Work For Comapny" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday June 11,
2019
Leadership And Guessing
Tags #business, #coffee, #managers & supervisors, #office
Transcript
alice to the boss: one option is to use the old method that has never once worked, but we think we know how to make it work next time. alice: the other option is to try something new that we can't be sure will work. alice: it's almost as if leadership is nothing but guessing. the boss drinking coffee: let's change the subject.
Saturday June 01,
2019
Winners Never Quit
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #inspirational quotes
Transcript
the boss: i'm not having much luck with my inspirational quotes, but i thought i would try one more time. the boss: "winners never quit, and quitters never win." dilbert: when ted quit, you gave him a raise to stay. the boss: these work better when you don't think about them.
Saturday May 11,
2019
Twitch Gets You More Work
Tags #business, #communication, #office, #office workers, #project
Transcript
the boss: does anyone have an idea for fixing our communication problem with marketing? dilbert, alice, wally and asok thinking: must...not...speak or else he will assign the project to me. the boss: i saw your eye twitch. the project is all yours. alice: GAAAA!!! visually upset
Tuesday April 23,
2019
Wally And The Management Track
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers
Transcript
wally: how can i get on the management track? catbert: are you kidding me? catbert: you are the most useless employee i have ever seen. all you do is walk around and bother people who are trying to work. wally: are you saying i can't get on the management track? catbert: i'm saying you're already on it.
Thursday April 04,
2019
Asok In A Coma
Tags #business, #coffee, #office, #office workers, #coma, #dopamine
Transcript
dilbert running: ask appears to be in some kind of coma. what should we do? the boss: we see this a lot. his job is so boring that it caused his dopamine to crash. the boss: show him some funny car videos and give him a coffee i.v. dilbert: part of me doesn't want that to work.
Wednesday April 03,
2019
It Already Works
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #phone, #nuclear
Transcript
office worker: your so-called "safe" nuclear power invention will never work. dilbert: it already works. i'm charging my phone with it. office worker: i mean, it will never be economical. dilbert: it can power a small city for a dollar per day. office worker: pffft. i'll bet it ends up costing triple that.
Tuesday March 05,
2019
Asok's Employee Engagement
Tags #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #work, #attitude, #expectations
Transcript
Boss: Asok, your employee engagement has been a bit soft this quarter. I expect a higher level of irrational enthusiasm for the endless string of thankless tasks you call your job. Asok: How's this? Boss: I also want to see an unnatural preference for work over leisure.
Saturday February 23,
2019
Hard Work Is The Key
Tags #Advice, #office, #office workers, #success, #difficult
Transcript
Boss: The key to your personal success is hard work. Dilbert: Was it hard for you to learn that? Boss: No, it was easy. Dilbert: Do you mind if I get my advice from someone who worked it at harder?
Friday February 01,
2019
Ten Year Financial Projections
Sunday January 27,
2019
Tags #argument, #boss, #business, #change, #frustration, #managers & supervisors, #money, #salary, #company
Transcript
Boss: I can't give you a raise because you didn't accomplish anything this year. Dilbert: Are you insane? I completely redesigned our line of products!!! Boss: That was mostly last year. Dilbert: You didn't give me a raise last year because I wasn't finished until January of this year. Now you aren't giving me a raise this year because I did most of the work last year. Give me one reason I shouldn't quit right now! Boss: Because every other company is just as bad. And you don't like change. Dilbert: I said one reason!