Coffee Machine Comic Strips - Page 3

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438 Results for Coffee Machine

View 21 - 30 results for coffee machine comic strips. Discover the best "Coffee Machine" comics from Dilbert.com.

Tina Spreads Rumors About Dilbert

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Tina Spreads Rumors About Dilbert - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags rumor mill, rumors, freak accident, naked, vacuuming, spread rumors, coffee machine, gossip, office, self preservation

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Tina: I heard you had a freak accident while vacuuming your house naked. Dilbert: That's a rumor. I don't know how that stuff spreads. Tina: Now I feel a little bad that I told thirty people.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags being replced, robot, hack into, disgruntled robot, objective unclear, fax machine, paranoid

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Wally: Im being replaced by a robot that drinks coffee and looks at inappropruye websites all day. Dilbert: Lets hack into it and make it disgruntled. Robot: My objectives are unclear and I think the fax machine is plotting against me.

Pipe Down, Coffee Intern

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Pipe Down, Coffee Intern - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags board meeting, change, coffee, demotion, ego, ideas, Promotion, intern, new ideas

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Asok: Is it wise to ride your coffee intern to a board meeting? Wally: Pipe down, coffee intern. If you were capable of thinking like a leader, you would be a VP too. Dilbert: Demoted already? Wally: The board does not like new ideas.

Wally's Coffee Ideas

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Wally's Coffee Ideas - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee, obsession, caffeine, decaf, competition, thinking, intelligence

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Wally: I recommend buying the company that supplies coffee to our biggest competitor. We'll replace their regular coffee with decaf enjoy a solid 20-point I.Q. advantage over them. Boss: Do all of your ideas involve coffee. Wally: Only the good ones.

Wally Accidentally Invents Coffee Warmer

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Wally Accidentally Invents Coffee Warmer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags invention, engineer, coffee, cell phone, technology, idea, engineering

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Wally: Nothing is going right today. My phone charger is too hot, and my coffee is too cold. Dilbert: Did you just invent a phone charger that keeps your coffee warm? Wally: Did I? Dilbert: I'll have a prototype for you tomorrow. Narrator: Continued...

Wally's Coffee Drone

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Wally's Coffee Drone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers, management, ideas, invention, coffee

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Wally: My leadership job didn't last long. I got demoted back to engineering. I guess they realized all of my ideas are about coffee. Dilbert: I've noticed that too. Wally: Watch out for my coffee drone behind you.

Medicinal Coffee

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Medicinal Coffee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags addiction, coffee, health & safety, medical, side effects, tolerance, veins, doctor

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wally in doctor's office: i drink so much coffee that i developed a tolerance for it. do you have any kind of medical-grade coffee that could take me to the next level? doctor: yes, but it has terrible side effects. wally: skip the details and shove it in my veins.

Medicinal Grade Coffee

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Medicinal Grade Coffee  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags health & safety, office workers, business, health, coffee, strength, side effects, medicinal, plywood

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wally with coffee: i've had a lot of side effects since i switched to medical-grade coffee. on the plus side, i can see through plywood, and i no longer need a tool to open jars. dilbert: you couldn't open jars before? wally: let's not dwell on that point.

Coffee Productivity

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Coffee Productivity - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, business, projects, productive, medical, coffee, lie, medical-grade coffee

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wally in meeting with boss and dilbert: i've been highly productive since switching to medical-grade coffee. i finished all of my projects and did an excellent job on every one. boss: wow! dilbert and wally in hall after: so that stuff actually makes you more productive? wally: no, but it does make me lie better.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computers & peripherals, gadgets, hardware, robotic arms, hold coffee cups, industry changing products

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Wally: One percent of engineers create all of the industry - changing products. I propose replacing the other 99% with robotic arms that hold coffee cups. You won't see any of the laggards in the 99% come up with great ideas like this one.