Search Results for "creativity"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 1989's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #phone, #answering machine, #greeting message, #demonstration, #Dogbert, #demonstrating

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert tells Dogbert, "I bought a phone answering machine." Dogbert asks, "Was the phone asking you questions you couldn't answer on your own?" Dilbert says, "The hard part is thinking of a greeting message." Dilbert says into the answering machine, "Hi. This is Dilbert. I'm not here right now." Dilbert says, "Well, technically I am here 'now' . . ." Dilbert says, "But 'now' is a relative term, so use your best judgment in deciding whether I'm here." Dilbert says, "Hmm . . . That was actually a creative little message." Dogbert says, "Demonstrating, once again, that subtle difference between creativity and complex stupidity."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 29, 1996's comic on:


Tags #presentation package, #worked 12 hrs, #creative, #stupor, #dementia, #worse

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice stands in front of the Boss's desk looking tired and disheveled. She hands some documents to the Boss and says, "Here's my presentation package. I worked twelve straight hours on it." Alice continues, "That includes three hours of creativity followed by nine hours of stupor, senseless twiddling and outright dementia." Alice says, "I suppose there's only one thing that could make this presentation worse." The Boss says, "Send it around for comments."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2008's comic on:


Tags #employees, #meeting, #miss step, #mole hired, #reporting, #chilling effect, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

RAtBert: I'm the official department mole. I'll be reporting your every misstep to your pointy-haired boss. Dilbert: Won't this have a chilling effect on our creativity and honesty?" RatBert: That didn't take long.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 27, 2014's comic on:


Tags #analogies, #creativity, #haters, #ideas, #trapped ideas, #attract haters, #zombies to fish syicks, #analogy, #great ideas

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My best ideas are trapped in my head. Whenever I voice my ideas, I attract haters like zombies to fish sticks. Wally: IS that analogy one of your great ideas? Dilbert: I don't like the way you asked that.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 28, 2015's comic on:


Tags #meditate, #meditation, #mindful, #mindfulness, #mbct, #stress, #trick, #laziness, #deception, #work ethic, #ruse, #nap, #napping

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Do you mind if I take Steve Jobs' advice and practice meditation and mindfulness? Science says meditation can reduce stress and make me more productive. And obviously it worked for Steve Jobs, so there's that. To the untrained eye, it will seem as if I am napping. But in reality, I will be quieting my mind to boost creativity. Boss: Meditate on your own time. Wally: Wow. That just stressed me out and shut down my creative juices. Boss: Just do your job! Wally: Because quality doesn't matter?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2015's comic on:


Tags #manager, #inspiration, #entrepreneur, #risk, #irony, #catch-22, #creativity, #creative, #motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I want you to think like entrepreneurs. Dilbert: Should we take huge risks? Boss: No, the stockholders would hate that. Alice: Should we act as though we have no boss? Boss: NO. That would be chaos. Dilbert: Will we become billionaires if we succeed? Boss: Raises are capped at 3% this year. I'm just saying you should be more creative. Dilbert: and then we should act? Boss: No, that's when the problems happen.

Be Creative With Funding

Thank you for voting.
Be Creative With Funding  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #creativity, #funding, #money, #progress, #trick

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I couldn't do any work this week because you forgot to ask for funding for my project. Boss: Stop making excuses. Be creative. Ted: Why do you want to know my project charge code? Dilbert: Just curious.

Ted Complains About Dilbert

Thank you for voting.
Ted Complains About Dilbert  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 2017's comic on:


Tags #budget, #money, #funding, #creativity, #embezzlement, #fraud

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted is complaining that you charged your expenses to his project. Dilbert: You told me to be creative because you forgot to fund my project. Boss: I wasn't expecting you to do that. Dilbert: That's what makes it creative. I looked it up.

Need To Be More Creative

Thank you for voting.
Need To Be More Creative - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2018's comic on:


Tags #manager, #managing, #creativity, #company culture, #control, #leadership

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We need to be more creative. Also, don't do anything except what I tell you to do or else I'll fire you. Dilbert: Thank you for your leadership. Boss: We also need to communicate less.