Critical Folder Comic Strips - Page 3

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54 Results for Critical Folder

View 21 - 30 results for critical folder comic strips. Discover the best "Critical Folder" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 1995's comic on:


Tags #reduce budget

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "We've been asked to reduce our budget. I'm going to offer to cut your project because it's the most critical." The Boss continues, "The finance guys won't dare cut that project. My ploy will spare us from any cuts at all." Dilbert says, "Excuse me while I panic." The Boss says, "Tell me again what your project is about. They might ask."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 1989's comic on:


Tags #computer, #love, #marriage, #cure, #technology, #relationships

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Dilbert shouts, "Dogbert! Dogbert! Come here quickly!!" Dilbert says, "My computer simulation has discovered the chemical that causes LOVE!" Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a desk. Dilbert explains, "Apparently, it deactivates the parts of the brain responsible for critical thought and eating." Dogbert says, "Wow! You can inject people with that chemical and make them fall in love!" Dilbert says, "I was thinking more along the lines of a cure . . ." Dogbert replies, "Oh, like marriage."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 13, 1998's comic on:


Tags #hideous treatment, #employees, #elbnina factory, #forced to wear clamps, #no union, #business

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Alice hold a folder and says, "Here's my report on the hideous treatment of employees in our Elbonian factory." The Boss sits at his desk. Alice holds her hands up to her head and says, "The employees are forced to wear huge clamps on their heads." The Boss looks at the report. At the lunch table in the employee cafeteria, Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit with trays of food and large clamps on their heads. Alice says, "Then I said, 'The employees can't complain because they have no union." Wally says "Swift," and he and Dilbert frown.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 28, 1999's comic on:


Tags #awake, #two days staright, #deadline, #all for nothing, #middel, #stack, #forget it

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Alice stands at Carol's desk. Alice hair is a mess and she holds a report. Alice says, "I stayed awake for two days straight to finish this R.F.Q. by the deadline." Alice says, "But it will all be for nothing if you don't send it out today." Alice hands the folder to Carol. Carol puts the folder in the middle of a huge pile of papers on her desk and says, "I'll put it in the middle of the stack so I won't forget."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 1999's comic on:


Tags #speak english, #think in french, #french lessons, #croissant

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Carol is standing next to the boss's desk holding a folder. The boss is sitting at his desk while signing a sheet of paper says: "I speak English but I think in French." The boss hands a sheet of paper to Carol and says: "Someday I'll take French lessons to find out what the heck I'm thinking." Carol exits the boss's office and the boss thinks: "Croissant"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 10, 1999's comic on:


Tags #websmistress ming, #broken link, #Men, #perverse pleasure, #graphics are slow

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Webmistress Ming: Wally and Ming are talking in a hallway, Ming is holding a folder. Wally says to Ming: "You have a broken link." Ming answers: "I know, I know." Asok is standing in the door of Ming's cubicle and Ming is sitting at her computer. Asok says to Ming: "You have a broken link." Ming answers:"I know, I know." Ming is lying down on a reclining chair at a therapist office, the therapist is sitting behind her and taking notes. Ming says to the therapist: "The men are getting perverse pleasure from reporting my broken links." The therapist answers: "Your graphics are slow, too"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 13, 1999's comic on:


Tags #rescheduled meeting, #meeting, #premeeting, #schedule, #pre care, #business

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Carol walks into Dilbert's cubicle hands him a folder and says to Dilbert: "I rescheduled the pre-meeting." Dilbert looks at the folder and says to Carol: "Now the pre-meeting is after the meeting." Carol says to Dilbert: "I'll schedule some time for me to pre-care."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 14, 1999's comic on:


Tags #being a manager, #less condescending, #wrong, #performance evaluation, #laughter, #Catbert, #boss

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The boss is sitting in his office and Catbert is sitting on the boss's desk. Catbert says to the boss:"Being a manager means never having to be less condescending just because you're wrong." Both Catbert and the boss laugh out loud: "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha" Carol is sitting at her computer and Dilbert is standing behind her holding a folder. Dilbert says to Carol: "Did he finish my performance evaluation?" Carol answers: "I heard him working on it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2000's comic on:


Tags #can't read, #ceo, #copies, #esearch, #hand off, #manage data, #no copies, #smother me, #documents

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CEO says...: The CEO is sitting at his desk showing a folder to the Senior VP. The CEO says to the Senior VP: "The research supports my strategy." The CEO hands the folder to the Senior VP and says: "You can read the research but don't make copies." Senior VP says...: The Senior VP is holding the folder with both hands and says to the VP: "I can tell you about it but you can't read it." VP says...: The VP says to the Assistant VP: "I don't remember the reason but I'm sure there is one." Assistant VP says...: The Assistant VP is sitting at his desk and he says to the boss: "There's no reason." The boss, Wally and Dilbert are in a meeting and the boss says to them: "Our strategy is a huge mistake but we have to do it anyway." Dilbert is holding a suitcase and says to Dogbert: "After I fall asleep tonight, please smother me with a pillow." The CEO is sitting at his desk and thinks: "My people love me because I manage with data."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 2002's comic on:


Tags #engineering anaysis, #unnecessary assignment, #non existent software, #sweet smell

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The Boss says to Dilbert and Wally, "It's critical that you finish this engineering analysis by Tuesday." Dilbert says, "Aahh.. It has the sweet smell of an unnecessary assignment." Wally says, "Yes, I can smell it from here." Dilbert says, "Feasibility of using non-existent software." Wally giggles, "Hee Hee!" The Boss says, "Stop being you."