Cure For Carpel Tunnel Comic Strips - Page 3

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33 Results for Cure For Carpel Tunnel

View 21 - 30 results for cure for carpel tunnel comic strips. Discover the best "Cure For Carpel Tunnel" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #prison (jail), #governments data, #hidden tunnel, #elbonian embassy

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NSA Agent: Maybe a few days in solitary will make you tell us how you stole the government's data. Dilbert: Is this the cell with the hidden tunnel? NSA Agent: The what? Dilbert: I'll be at the Elbonian embassy.

Dogbert Is Doctor Of Impossible

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Dogbert Is Doctor Of Impossible - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #business, #cure, #diseases, #doctor, #fail, #headache, #ice-cold bath, #impossible, #improvement, #medical, #prescribe, #sarcasm, #treatments, #health and wellnes

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dogbert: i'm dogbert, doctor of the impossible. boss: does that mean you cure diseases that are believed to be impossible to cure? dogbert: no, that sounds boring. i prescribe treatments that are impossible to follow. when you fail you don't get better. you'll think it's your own fault. boss: how does that help anyone but you? dogbert: hey, i'm not the one who brought it up. boss: you're giving me a headache. dogbert: to cure that, i suggest ice-cold baths every six minutes.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criticize coworkers, #look smart, #nuts, #dogbert therapist, #weekly sessions, #run out of money, #vure, #therapy, #paid by hour, #fasle memory, #aliens, #psychology

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Ed lies in the therapy bed and tells Dogbert, " I criticize my co-workers to make myself look smart." Dogbert says, "Apparently it isn't working." Ed asks, "What do you mean by that?" Dogbert replies, "Nothing. Oooh. That reminds me to add nuts to my grocery list." Dogbert says, "I recommend that we have weekly sessions until you run out of money." Ed asks, "Can you cure me?" Dogbert replies, "No, I'm paid by the hour. I'll give you problems you've never even heard of." Dogbert says, "We have a few minutes today. Would you like a false memory?" Ed replies, "Maybe something with aliens?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #assisted suicide, #brochure, #job makes alice sick, #doctor, #doctors office, #medical

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ALice sits in the doctor's office. Alice says, "Are you saying my job makes my sick?" Doctor says, "Don't worry there's a cure." The docotr hands Alice a pamphlet and says, "Here's a brochure on assisted suicide." Alice says, "How do you assists?" The doctor says, "I gave you the brochure."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #justin, #job interview, #medical research, #hydroelectric dam, #sound of idealism dying, #fabric covered boxes

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An interviewee sits at the table across from Dilbert. Dilbert asks, "So...Justin, why do you want to work here?" Justin replies, "I want to find a cure for asthma!" Dilbert replies, "We don't do medical research here." Justin says, "Oh." Justin holds out his arms and says, "Then I want to build the biggest hydroelectric dam in the world!" Dilbert says, "We don't do that either." Justin asks, "What do you do?" Dilbert replies, "We sit in fabric-covered boxes." Justin sits there and a snapping noise sounds above his head. It goes, "Shrivel. Crinkle. Ack!" Dilbert says, "That was the sound of your idealism dying." Justin says, "Show me to my box."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #defective coworker, #trade in, #co workers with defects, #parts hair in middle, #defects yet discovered

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Dilbert carries Peri Noid into a back tunnel way. The Garbageman says, "You can't repair a defective co-worker." The Garbageman leads Dilbert into a room filled with defective co-workers enclosed in glass capsules. The Garbageman says, "The best you can do is trade for a co-worker whose defects you haven't yet discovered." Dilbert points to a man and asks, "What's wrong with this one?" The Garbageman replies, "He parts his hair in the middle; that's just wrong."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #egos, #europe to denver, #lies, #made up, #management retreat, #middle management, #press release, #top

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Dilbert: I can't imagine you told everyone at the management retreat.... But our marketing department issued press release sago were designing a tunnel linking Europe to Denver. FLASHBACK Man: Im installing a new sprinkler system in my lawn. The boss: Must top.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #habitual liar, #ordered on internet, #resist free stuff

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Dilbert: "Karl, you're a habitual liar but these pills that I ordered over the internet will cure you." Karl: "I've never lied in my life, but I can't resist free stuff." Dilbert: "Um... Are you alive?" Karl: "Never felt better!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"Sometimes I feel as if my life is nothing but moving things from one place to another." "I've decided to seek a deeper connection with others to cure my emptiness." "Blah, blah, blah." "Maybe I'm doing it wrong."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #co worker, #tired, #dead, #died, #afterlife, #zombie, #alive again, #pictures in heaven, #eyes closed

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Topper Dilbert: I didn't get much sleep last night. Ted: That's nothing. I haven't slept in a month. Dilbert: Wouldn't that kill you? Ted: It did, but that's nothing. I spent a week in the afterlife, then I returned to this world as a zombie. I taught myself homeopathy and discovered a cure for zombies. Now I'm alive again. Please be done...Please be done...Please be done... I took pictures of heaven. Alice: Gaaa!!!"