Dilbert Busts Boss Comic Strips - Page 3
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1000 Results for Dilbert Busts Boss
View 21 - 30 results for dilbert busts boss comic strips. Discover the best "Dilbert Busts Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday May 30,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, consultant, advised, handle, sneaking, stamping, cancelled, understand, goodyear, blimp
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "My consultant advised me to handle the layoffs in a direct, professional way." The Boss holds up a rubber stamp and continues, "So, throughout the day I'll be sneaking up on people and stamping 'Canceled' on their backs." As Wally runs away, Alice says, "Let me see if I understand . . ." The Boss points and says, "Hey! Is that the Goodyear blimp?"
Thursday June 11,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, quality, brainwashed, transformed, fabric, corporate, culture, Wally
Transcript
Dilbert and the other employees walk around the office as if in a trance, saying, "Quality . . . Quality . . . Quality . . ." The Boss thinks, "It's working. All the employees are brainwashed." The Boss yells, "I've done it! I've transformed the very fabric of the corporate culture!" Dilbert says to Wally, "Things sure have changed around here." Wally replies, "Yeah, for example, my arms are tired."
Monday August 24,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, good, articles, paper, magnets, sign, language, write, white, influence, project, working, minutia
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters holding a newspaper and says, "There are two good articles in the paper today; one about magnets, and one on sign language." The Boss continues, "I'd like you to write a white paper on how these items could influence the project you're working on." Dilbert asks, "Do you even know what project I'm working on?" The Boss replies, "I don't have time to get into minutia."
Thursday August 27,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, ben, newest, fast-track, manager, real, experience, executive, style, hair, silver
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "Dilbert, I'd like you meet Ben, our newest fast-track manager." Dilbert says, "Hi." The Boss says, "Ben has no real experience but he's very tall, so we know he'll go far." Ben adds, "I also have executive style hair." The Boss says, "We think it will turn silver."
Monday August 31,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, rivers, trees, management, variety, dangerous, tasks, woods, survival, depend, creativity, ability, team-building, exercise, headcount, reduction
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "I'm sending all of you to the 'Rivers and Trees' management course." The Boss continues, "There you'll be asked to perform a variety of dangerous tasks in the woods. Your survival will depend on your creativity and ability to work together." Dilbert says, "Oh, so it's a team-building exercise." The Boss replies, "I think of it more as a headcount reduction thing."
Thursday September 10,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, light, travels, sound, shout, speak, lips, appear, sync-up, words, knowledge, ridiculous, thing, heard
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters and says, "I just heard that light travels faster than sound." The Boss continues, "I'm wondering if I should shout when I speak, just so my lips appear to sync-up with my words." Dilbert thinks, "A little knowledge can be a ridiculous thing." The Boss thinks, "He probably hasn't heard me yet."
Thursday October 15,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, received, employee, suggestion, handle, blanket, imbeciles, process
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss enters and says, "I just received your employee suggestion." The Boss continues, "We'll handle it the usual way -- by making you sit under a wet blanket surrounded by imbeciles." Dilbert sits in a chair with a blanket covering his head. Four stupid people stand around him. Dilbert thinks, "At least there's a process." A man asks, "Explain your suggestion again."
Monday December 07,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, humor, workplace, tension, employee, Wally, alice
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and a woman, "I've decided to use humor in the workplace." The Boss continues, "Experts say humor eases tension which is important in times when the workforce is being trimmed." The Boss says to an employee, "Knock-knock." The man asks, "Who's there?" The Boss answers, "Not you anymore."
Tuesday December 08,
1992
Tags humor, Dilbert, the boss, tension, engineers, lightbulb, appraisal
Transcript
Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "I'm going to use humor to ease the tension during your annual job performance appraisal." The Boss asks, "How many engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?" Dilbert says, "I don't know." The Boss says, "Well, that's consistent with your appraisal." Dilbert says, "Wait . . . I'll say three."
Monday December 14,
1992
Tags Dilbert, the boss, transferred, assignments, management, yanking, chain, over-communicating, manager, sales
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "Dilbert, you're being temporarily transferred to the field sales organization." The Boss continues, "Normally we use these assignments to round somebody out for management. But in this case I'm just yanking your chain!" Dilbert says, "You're over-communicating again, sir." The Boss continues, "Plus, I hate the manager of sales."