Dumb Ideas Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

308 Results for Dumb Ideas

View 21 - 30 results for dumb ideas comic strips. Discover the best "Dumb Ideas" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #conversation, #ask ed, #dumb guy, #liar, #bad breath, #braggaty, #large pores, #combover, #describe me, #behind my back, #insecure guy, #steers conversation

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: You should ask Ed about this. Carol: Is Ed the dumb guy who talks too much or the liar with the bad breath? Alice: He's the braggart with large pores and a combover. Dilbert: Wow. How do you describe me behind my back? Carol: You're the insecure guy who steers the conversation to himself.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #brag, #contributions, #ego, #hours of work, #man of ideas, #meeting, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: My contributions can't be measured by the number of hours I work. I'm a man of ideas. One great idea is worth more than all of you put together. Boss: Fine. Let's hear your great idea. Wally: You just did.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #inventions, #new app, #ten people created something, #population increases, #potentail value, #enter world, #unoriginal ideas, #agreeing

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Every time I have an idea for a new app, I discover that ten people already created something just like it. As the population of the world increases, the potential value of every idea I have approaches zero. Dogbert: So, it's the entire world's fault that you have unoriginal ideas? Dilbert: Why does your agreeing sound like mocking?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interviewed users, #suggestions, #idiots, #dumb suggestions, #hindsight

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We interviewed hundreds of users and turned all of their suggestions into features. As it turns out, every user we talked to was an idiot, and their dumb suggestions ruined our product. In hindsight, we probably should have talked to people who work outside this building.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #retail business, #sales drop, #retail stores, #self checkout, #dumb customers, #most shoplifted

View Transcript

Transcript

Finance Troll: Our sales have dropped to zero in retail stores that have self-checkout. Apparently the people who are dumb enough to want our product are too dumb to know how to use the self-checkout. On a positive note, we have the most shoplifted product of the year. Boss: Yes!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #idea, #shredding gloves, #bad listener, #dumb idea

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Hold that thought until I put on my idea-shredding gloves. Dilbert: My idea is that...we...um... You're a bad listener. Alice: Tell me more about your dumb idea.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #brainstorm, #discussion, #less effective, #meetings, #new product ideas, #stem cell technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Let's brainstorm new product ideas. Remember, the most important rule of brainstorming is no criticizing. Dilbert: I'll go first. Research shows that brainstorming is less effective than people working by themselves and later comparing ideas. My idea is to use stem cell technology to design bosses who aren't ignoramuses. Remember, you're not supposed to criticize ideas. But if you decide to do it anyway, it sort of proves my point. I understand whey brainstorming has a bad reputation, but it doesn't stop me from enjoying it.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #nasa, #shuttle, #specific, #duties, #video, #risky, #experiment, #ideas

View Transcript

Transcript

Nasa Scientist 1: You will be with one other... Uh... Astronaut in a private room. You two will have no specific duties on this mission. I'll be monitoring you on video. Nasa Scientist 2: A nerd, a monkey, and one Nintendo at zero gravity... Pretty risky experiment. Nasa Scientist 1: To be honest, we were running low on good ideas.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #park bench, #Dogbert, #parties, #lift, #heavy, #sound, #dumb, #body, #builder, #pay

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a park bench next to a muscular man. The large man says, "It's not easy to be a professional body builder." The man continues, "At parties, people ask what I do. I have to say 'I lift heavy things, then I put them down.' It makes me sound dumb." Dogbert asks, "How's the pay?" The man asks, "Pay?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #elbonia, #elbonians, #free, #speech, #societal, #market, #pressures, #squelch, #original, #ideas

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Dogbert and several Elbonians sit at a conference table. Dogbert is wearing a miter. An Elbonian says, "Your Highness, the Elbonian people demand free speech." The man continues, "But don't worry, we'll still have societal and market pressures to squelch any original ideas." The man continues, "Frankly, all we want to do is make fun of your little hat."