Ever Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

350 Results for Ever

View 21 - 30 results for ever comic strips. Discover the best "Ever" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computers & peripherals, #office equipment, #email servers, #inbox, #vowels only, #complain, #loudest, #complain to boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Ever since you moved our email servers to Transylbonia, my inbox has nothing but vowels. I.T. person: We I.T. people only respond to whoever complains loudest. You should complain to your bosss. Dilbert: I will! Boss' Computer: A ui aoe uie ou eai!

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office equipment, #upgrades, #servers, #upgrade some, #guard all

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We need to upgrade some of our servers. Coworker: That's dumb. We upgraded two of them last week. Dilbert: Right now we need to upgrade the rest of them. Coworker: Then why did you say we have to upgrade all of them? Dilbert: Well, I didn't. But I think we all agree on what needs to be done. Coworker: Not if you insist on upgrading the servers we already upgraded last week. Dilbert: Gaaaa!!! Kill me with a comet!!! Coworker: Does he ever say anything that makes sense? Wally: There's no way to be sure.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #internet & world wide web, #research, #believe internet, #roll eyes, #ignorance, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: According to my research on the internet, Plan B will work best. Boss: I'm rolling my eyes because you believe everything you read on the internet. Dilbert: I should take a picture in case someone ever asks me if ignorance has a tell.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #app store, #created app, #dream killer, #first name, #free apps, #madonna, #sell a million, #mother, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I spent four months creating this app, mom. I think I can sell a million of them for $3.99. Mom: I saw seven apps just like this in the app store and five of them were free. Dilbert: Thanks for the feedback, dream-killer. Mom: Have you ever thought of just using your first name, like Madonna?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lunch date, #not attracted, #technoloigy, #only like tech, #people are creepy, #delivery system, #viruses, #germs, #picture, #photoshop, #people hater

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Wally, do you want to go to lunch? Wally: No, thanks. I"m a digisexual now. Tina: What: Wally: I'm no longer attracted to people. I only like technology. People creep me out. You're basically a delivery system for viruses, germs, and unreasonable favor requests. I'm willing to take a picture of you, but that's as far as I'll go. Tina: This is the most disturbing conversation I've ever had. Wally: Thank goodness for Photoshop.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #knowledge, #electronic, #bluff

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in a computer retail store. A boy with long hair says, "Welcome to Electrode Hut. I'm half your age, and I know more about electronics than you ever will. May I help you?" Dilbert replies, "Yes. I would like a half-dozen niad pulse converters and an anza brush." Dilbert asks, "Or am I bluffing?" The clerk wrings his hands and thinks, "This guy is GOOD."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #walk, #watching, #different

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks Dogbert, "Did you ever notice that people walk a little differently when other people are watching?" Dogbert replies, "No, never." Dilbert and Dogbert look at each other. Dilbert asks, "Don't you need to go anywhere?" Dogbert replies, "After you, banjo legs."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #car, #dating, #eyes, #lucky, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "Did you ever think how lucky people are that their eyes are located on their heads?" Dogbert continues, "Suppose your eyes were on your ankles; you wouldn't be able to drive a car." Dilbert leaves. Dogbert continues, "Without cars, dating would be impossible. No dating, then no marriage. Soon the species would be extinct."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #eat, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "How to be boring: 'Great Things I Have Eaten' series." Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, "But by far, the best baked potato I've ever eaten was six years ago . . ." The caption says, "The victim may try sarcasm to relieve the boredom." Dogbert says, "Fascinating, now could you think out loud all of the possible dates this may have occurred?" The caption says, "Sarcasm won't work." Dilbert says, "Well, it could have been on October 6th . . . Or maybe the 16th. Was that a Tuesday?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #helen, #asking, #date, #Women, #first-strike, #capability

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert picks up a ringing phone. Dilbert says, "Hello." The voice on the phone says, "This is Helen. We've never met but don't even THINK of asking me for a date . . . ever." Helen hangs up. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Women got first-strike capability." Dogbert says, "Surrender."