Getting Worse Comic Strips - Page 3
Search Filters
Year
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
391 Results for Getting Worse
View 21 - 30 results for getting worse comic strips. Discover the best "Getting Worse" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday June 20,
2000
Tags #male brain, #treat like dirt, #good personalities, #overated, #getting hot
Transcript
Ming says to Dilbert, "Help me understand the male brain, Dilbert." Ming asks Dilbert, "I treat you like dirt and you ask me out on a date?" Dilbert replies, "Good personalities are overrated." Ming responds, "You're getting me all hot over here."
Thursday May 17,
2001
Tags #taking bribes, #from vendors, #feel guilty, #getting paid, #walk with cup, #looks harder
Transcript
Carol sits behind her desk. Wally approaches with a cup of coffee and says, "Do you feel guilty about taking bribes from vendors?" Carol replies, "No. Do you feel guilty getting paid to walk around with a coffee cup?" Wally walks away thinking, "I need a bigger cup so this looks harder."
Wednesday June 19,
2002
Tags #accounting system, #accounting troll, #groupies, #worse place, #finance troll, #project
Transcript
Dilbert says to an accounting troll, "I need you to be a subject matter expert on my accounting system project." The troll asks, "Will it make the world a worse place to live?" Dilbert replies, "I think so." The troll continues, "I'm in." Dilbert asks, "What's it like to be an accounting troll?" The troll responds, "To be honest, I'm only in it for the groupies."
Wednesday April 30,
2003
Tags #embezzelment, #explain revenue, #layoffs, #sacrificing, #worse than you, #co worker
Transcript
Dogbert is standing on Dilbert's desk. Dogbert says, "You can survive the next round of layoffs by sacrificing a co- worker." Dogbert continues, "You must make your boss believe that someone is a worse employee than you." Dilbert is at a meeting. He turns to Ted and says, "Ted, let me explain revenue: it's like your embezzlement, but it's directed at customers."
Tuesday July 08,
2003
Tags #a bad day, #a worse day, #a much worse day, #ne job online, #trying to fill, #unqaulified
Transcript
Headline: A Bad Day. Dilbert stands in front of his computer and says, "Maybe it's time to look for a new job online." Headline: A Worse Day. Dilbert sits at his computer and says, "Hey, that's my job they're trying to fill." Headline: A Much Worse Day. Dilbert sits in his cubicle and says, "And I'm unqualified."
Saturday August 16,
2003
Tags #process of getting approval, #hard way, #meeting, #no direct answers, #business
Transcript
The man who couldn't give direct answers. Alice: "Did you ask your boss for approval?" Man: "Now i will explain the process for getting approval." Alice: "Do you want to do this the hard way?" Man: "First, you ask for a meeting."
Monday February 02,
2004
Tags #porject, #top prioroty, #tell everything, #bored, #can't stay awake, #haven't talked yet, #gets worse
Transcript
The Boss: Your project is my top priority. Tell me everything that I need to know. In so bored...cant...stay...awake. Dilbert: I haven't started talking yet. The Boss: Int gets worse??! Dilbert: oo okay
Monday November 22,
2004
Tags #your age, #talking to youth, #pleasure of flesh, #not getting it, #sought victory
Transcript
Wally: "When I was your age, Asok, I too sought the thrill of victory and the pleasure of the flesh." "But after twenty years of not getting either one, I made convenience my new mistress." "You know why I like talking to you?" Asok: "Because I am a good listener?" "No, because you're here."
Wednesday February 23,
2005
Tags #sales target, #have bad credit, #bonuses, #accounts receivable, #getting bonuses
Transcript
Dilbert: "The only way to meet our sales target is by selling to customers who have bad credit." The Boss: "That's okay, we'll get our bonuses before anyone realizes that the accounts recievables are worhtless." The Boss: "The key to getting bonusses is acting surprised later." Dilbert: "I feel unclean."
Thursday May 12,
2005
Tags #new guy, #strong culture, #doing teask, #unimaginable, #getting suckers, #to do our work
Transcript
The New Guy" "We have a strong culture of team--work here." "While you're doing those easy tasks, I'll be off doing assignments of unimaginable diffuculty." Dilbert: "Did anyone warn you that we have a strong culture of getting suckers to do our work?"