Great Cup Holder Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

443 Results for Great Cup Holder

View 21 - 30 results for great cup holder comic strips. Discover the best "Great Cup Holder" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #success at work, #coffee cup, #document, #whats in hands, #binder, #cigarette, #good or bad

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert tells Dilbert, "Your success at work depends on what you have in your hands when you walk around." Dogbert continues, "A coffee cup is bad. A document is good. A cigarette is bad. A binder is good. But the very worst thing . . ." Dilbert meets Wally in the hallway. Wally carries a coffee mug and a newspaper. Dilbert says, "It doesn't look like you're heading for the fast track, Wally." Wally replies, "Actually, I am, unless it's occupied."

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #brought dilbert, #competitors product, #cover cost, #cup of coffee, #makes product special, #visiting the customer, #deceptive advertising

View Transcript

Transcript

Kenny and Dilbert sit at a conference table with a customer. Kenny tells the man, "I brought Dilbert to explain what makes our product special." Dilbert says, "It's exactly like our competitor's product except we charge more to cover the cost of our deceptive advertising." The man gets up and leaves the room. Dilbert says, "While you're up, could you get me a cup of coffee?" Kenny looks angry.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #great news, #sell product line, #strongest comepetitor, #not viable, #amazingly stupid, #integrating line, #work here

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss walks up to Dilbert who is sitting at his computer. The Boss says, "Great news! Our strongest competitor offered to sell us their product line." Dilbert says, "Obviously they think their products are not viable. We'd have to be amazingly stupid..." The Boss interputs, "And you'll be in charge of integrating their product line with ours." Dilbert finishes, "...to work here."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #down in jet, #minor injuries, #saved by padding, #saved by prayer, #work great, #minor hair injuries, #100 nuns onboard, #nunnery, #not a lot of aerobics

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice throws her arms out wide and says, "Work has been great since our Boss went down in the jet!" Dilbert says, "Uh-oh." The Boss walks in, one side of his pointy hair bandaged. Alice and Dilbert are shocked. The Boss says, "I survived with only minor injuries. I was lucky to be on a flight that had a hundredd nuns onboard." Alice says, "You were saved by prayer?" The Boss replies, "No, padding. They don't do a lot of aerobics at the nunnery."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #evil hr director, #boss prevents new job, #great job, #outrageous, #bad situation worse, #human resource promise

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil H.R. Director: Dilbert sits in Catbert's office and waves his hands in the air as he says, "My boss is preventing me from transfering to a great job." Catbert says, "That's outrageous! There shouldn't be any great jobs at this company." Dilbert says, "Once again, you've made a bad situation worse." Catbert replies, "That's the human resources promise."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no charismatic leaders, #cable tv, #scandal, #diversion, #great news story, #fertility drugs, #in coffee

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sitting on a chair with a crown on his head while Garbage Man holds garbage bag. Dogbert asks, "Why are there no charismatic leaders anymore?" Garbage Man responds, "Cable TV." While placing garbage in dump truck, Garbage Man says, "Scandal is the most economical way to fill news programs. They'll go after you, too." Dogbert says, "I'll need a diversion." Dogbert and Dilbert on couch. Dilbert says, "I don't care if its a great news atory; I will NOT take fertility drugs!" Dogbert says, "They're in your coffee."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #45 inch screen, #communications staellite, #cure disease, #fish appear on screen, #great products, #marketing, #new product, #room freshener, #telepathic user, #whiten teeth, #time travel, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

How Great Products are designed The Boss: Go talk to marketing. Dilbert: Groan Dilbert: Dave, tell me what marketing wants the new product to do. Dave: It has to have a 45 inch screen and still fit in a purse or a wallet. Dave: It needs to act as a communications satellite as well as a room fresher. Dilbert: uh... Dave: it must cure deadly diseases and whoyten your teeth while you sleep! HAHA! and it has to be capable of time travel!! and have a telepathic user interface! Slap! Dilbert: I could write a program that makes fish appear on the computer screen, DAVE: yeah a lot of people want that.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #minor edits, #product brochure, #causes hallucinations, #sterility, #positive spin, #greatest writing challenge, #same old sights, #great gift, #conscince, #three pager

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Tina the Tech Writer, "Tina, we need a few minor edits on our product brochure." Tina sits at her desk and thinks, "Minor? Uh-oh . . ." The Boss continues, "We've discovered that our product causes hallucinations and sterility." The Boss continues, "See if you can put a positive spin on that." Tina thinks, "This will be my greatest writing challenge yet." Tina types, "Are you tired of the same old sights? We've got you covered." Tina types, ". . . Makes a great gift for those people who - in your opinion - should not reproduce." Tina thinks, "Ooh . . . I feel a tiny pang of conscience. That's one." Dilbert asks, "So the brochure was only a three-panger?" Tina replies, "Yeah, and I think I faked the third one."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #carl, #cubicle dwellers, #hard worker, #coffee cup, #walk around, #downsized, #co workers resntment, #snarky

View Transcript

Transcript

A man walks down the hall thinking, "I am Carl, the cubicle dwellers' friend." Carl thinks, "I travel from cubicle to cubicle to tell people how hard I'm working." Carl stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "I am working so-o-o-o hard. Work, work, work. It's all I do." Dilbert asks, "How is that possible?" Dilbert continues, "You walk around all day with that coffee cup resting on your belly." Dilbert asks, "Does your job description say 'transport coffee cup on belly'?" Carl walks away thinking, "He's a terrible conversationalist." Dilbert asks, "How many miles per gallon do you get?" Alice asks Carl, "Hypothetically, if you were downsized, how would the cup get around?" Carl thinks, "What's wrong with these people?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coffee cup, #lovely mug, #difference, #cash equivalent, #mug

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss holds a cup and says, "Every emplyee gets a lovely mug with our new motto, "I mad a differernce:=." Dilbert sits between Alice and Wally and says, "Question: May I have the cash equivalent of the mug instead?" The boss says, "No." Dilbert says, "May I have a mug that says, "I didn't make a differance"?"