Hows My Walking Comic Strips - Page 3

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View 21 - 30 results for hows my walking comic strips. Discover the best "Hows My Walking" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #public speaking, #questioning, #embrace failures, #learn from them

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Boss: We must embrace our failures and learn from them. Alice: That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Wally: How's the learning coming along?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interviews, #suspicion, #job interview, #brand online, #blog, #tweets, #facebook, #credit, #criminal record, #transcripts, #refrences, #external stuff, #attitude, #yrine test, #dna test, #tanning bed, #mri, #psychology

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Job interview Boss: I researched your personal brand online. Man: My what? Boss: I looked at your blog, your Tweets, an your Facebook page. I Googled your name and followed every link. I checked your credit, criminal record, school transcripts, and references. But that's just the external stuff. Man: Exactly. It's my attitude that counts! Boss: No. I mean I also have the results of your urine test. Oh, and apparently some of your sample landed in a DNA test kit. And that tanning bed you used last week was actually an MRI. How's your attitude now? Man: Harder to fake.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #executives, #busy converting, #lower morle, #stirring up trouble, #departments, #undercommunicating, #business

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Carol: He's busy converting everything you did this year into a complete waste of time. After that, he's scheduled to lower our morale. Then he'll be stirring up trouble in other departments. Dilbert: How's tomorrow look? Carol: He'll be under-communicating all day.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #inventions, #quantum computer, #prototype, #success, #in between state

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Boss: How's your quantum computer prototype coming along? Wally: Great! The project exists in a simultaneous state of being both totally successful and not even started. Boss: Can I observe it? Wally: That's a tricky question.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #free app, #stealing personal info, #lodge complaint, #monthly subscription, #package, #history of contaxcts, #sells itself

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Customer: Your free app is stealing my personal information. I'd like to lodge a complaint. Dogbert: Buy our monthly subscription package or I'll send your browser history to your contacts. Dilbert: How's your app going? Dogbert: It practically sells itself.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #invention, #lost, #invisible

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Dilbert sits at his desk with his arms folded. Dogbert approaches and asks, "How's your new 'stealth' cloaking invention coming along?" Dilbert walks away looking angry. Dogbert asks, "Can't find it, huh?" Dilbert replies, "Shaddup."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #love, #poetry, #finish, #relationships

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Dilbert sits at his desk writing a poem. Dogbert approaches and asks, "How's that poem coming?" Dilbert says, "Pretty good, but I may have written myself into a corner." Dogbert says, "Let's hear." Dilbert says, "All I have so far is 'Her love was like a wave-division multiplexor.'" Dogbert says, "Maybe just go for the big finish."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #neighbor, #participate, #talking

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Dilbert walks down the sidewalk. A man walking toward him says, "Hey, how are you? What's happenin'?" The man says, "Good to see you. I'm fine. Great, great. Take care." Dilbert thinks, "I guess there was no real need for me to participate in that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #brains, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #neighbors, #outiside, #talking, #tapioca, #vernon, #walking, #walks

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Vernon: Yo! Dilbert and Dogbert! Dilbert: Oh, no.... Dogbert: Yo. Vernon: Did I ever tell you about my favorite episode of, "Kojak?" Dogbert: Whoa! Vern, we gotta go before you turn our brains into tapioca! Dilbert: There's always the direct method.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #blind, #date, #full-bodied, #indivudal, #light, #overweight, #base, #camp, #ankles

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Dogbert sits on the bed watching Dilbert tie his tie. The doorbell rings and Dogbert says, "Must be your blind date. I'll let her in." Dilbert asks, "How's she look?" Dogbert replies, "Well, you could say she's a full-bodied individual." Dilbert asks, "You mean she's a little overweight?" Dogbert replies, "I mean Sherpas have established a base camp on her ankles."