Ignore Problem Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

437 Results for Ignore Problem

View 21 - 30 results for ignore problem comic strips. Discover the best "Ignore Problem" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 12, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #baldness, #testosterone, #hair, #gone, #flinging, #pores, #problem, #ted

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert and Ted, "Don't get too close - I found out that my baldness is caused by too much testosterone." Wally continues, "Now with my hair gone I'm afraid the testosterone will start flinging out of my pores." Drops of testosterone fly out of Wally's head. Ted says, "Hey! You got some on my shirt!" Wally raises his fists and says, "Do you have a problem with that?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 15, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #testosterone, #level, #tailgate, #problem, #trying

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally shows Dilbert a pickup truck and says, "Maybe it's because of my high testosterone levels, but I couldn't resist getting my pickup jacked up." Wally says, "I thought it would be more frightening to the people I tailgate." As he jumps into the truck and wiggles his legs, Wally says, "The only problem is that you can't let people see you trying to get in it."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 20, 1994's comic on:


Tags #behead, #corporate head hunter, #employee, #new employees, #staffing problem, #you'd be flexible, #go postal, #post office employee

View Transcript

Transcript

"We've never needed a corporate headhunter before, but now it's the only way to solve our staffing problem." "Are you aware that headhunters find new employees? We don't behead the ones you already have." "I don't suppose you'd be flexible..." "I could find a disgruntled ex-post office employee for you."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 1994's comic on:


Tags #interdisciplinary task force, #source of problem, #xray skull, #decision making process

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'm starting an interdisciplinary task force to study our decision-making process." Dilbert responds, "So, you're using a bad decision-making process to decide how to fix our bad decision-making process?" The Boss says, "I don't know how else we could find the source of our problem." Dilbert says, "X-ray your skull?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 04, 1995's comic on:


Tags #ratbert, #temp worker, #really testing self worth, #compensate list of talents, #walks past, #ignore i eat rubber, #i carry disease, #i enjoy opera

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert is in his box. He thinks, "This is really testing my sense of self-worth." Ratbert continues thinking, "I will compensate by shouting a list of my talents to anybody who walks past." Dilbert is standing next to Wally. Dilbert says, "Ignore him. He's trying to trick us into making eye contact." Out of view, Ratbert shouts, "I eat rubber! I carry disease! I enjoy opera!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 29, 1995's comic on:


Tags #alice sits boss, #approve expense voucher, #creature, #eats snacks, #security guard, #problem

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of Alice's desk. Alice has a crown on her head and is holding a document in her hand. She says, "I will approve your expense voucher on one condition." Alice continues, "You must slay the creature who stalks the office at night and eats our hidden snacks." Dilbert holds a baseball bat in one hand and opens a drawer with the other. A mouse peers out of the drawer. Dilbert says to him, "It has to be either you or the security guard." The mouse answers, "Slay him first and see if the problem stops."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 2012's comic on:


Tags #coders, #email, #incorporate specs, #meetings, #relevance, #spam filter, #wireframe, #wise counsel

View Transcript

Transcript

Based on a true story Coworker: I completed the wireframe and passed it off to our coders. Dilbert: That's great. Did you incorporate all of my specs? Coworker: I didn't see any specs from you. Maybe my spam filter ate your email. Dilbert: No problem. I'll resend them and you can start from scratch. Coworker: Yes, I certainly could do that. Or I could ignore your input, enjoy my deep feeling of accomplishment and hope for the best. Wally: That sounds easier. Coworker: I accept your wise counsel, Wally. I guess your search for relevance marches on.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #meeting, #copy, #agenda, #wrong, #awkward, #leave, #casually, #problem, #economy, #deeper, #interest, #rates, #cover, #dark

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert enters a conference room and asks, "Is this the meeting?" People at the table mumble a response. Dilbert says, "Good." A man says, "Everybody take a copy of the agenda." Dilbert reads the agenda and thinks, "I'm in the wrong meeting . . . Now it's too awkward to leave." Dilbert thinks, "I'll casually stretch my arms, flick the lights off and escape under cover of dark." Dilbert turns the light off. Several people say, "Ouch!" Five people lie on top of each other in the doorway. The man says, "Oh, sorry, wrong agenda." Dilbert arrives at home wearing tattered clothing. He tells Dogbert, "I'm starting to think that the problem with our economy is deeper than high interest rates."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 27, 1996's comic on:


Tags #biggest problem, #databases, #dwell on negative, #network, #probelm, #tracking database

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "I just got our consultant's report. He's identified our biggest problem." Wally says, "I recommend that we build a tracking database." Dilbert adds, "We can put it on the network." The Boss asks, "Would you like to hear what the problem is first?" Wally says, "I hate to dwell on the negative." Dilbert adds, "We like databases."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 1996's comic on:


Tags #alice slams wally, #fast forwarded, #harrasment, #ignore sexy, #mandatory video, #sext, #sexual harassment, #video, #evolution

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Alice, "I just watched the mandatory video on sexual harassment. It worked!" Wally continues, "In only thirty minutes, that video corrected a billion years of evolution. Do something sexy and watch me ignore it!" After Alice shoves Wally's head into the wall, he says, "I probably shouldn't have fast-forwarded through the boring parts."