Leave Callateral Comic Strips - Page 3
259 Results for Leave Callateral
View 21 - 30 results for leave callateral comic strips. Discover the best "Leave Callateral" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share August 09, 2000's comic on:
The Boss says to Dilbert, "I'm not allowed to poach employees if I leave this company." The Boss continues as he winks at Dilbert, "But there's no law against you asking me for a job...wink...wink." The Boss begins yelling, "I'm not going to wink all day you moron!"
Share November 29, 2000's comic on:
Dilbert, Catbert and The Boss look at Asok the Intern's legs sticking straight up in the air. Dilbert asks, "Asok is down. Does anyone know CPR?" The Boss says to Dilbert, "Is CPR the one where we take his kidney and leave him in a tub of ice?" Dilbert says to The Boss, "Um... I don't think so." The Boss says, "We'd better strip him and shave him just in case."
Share February 12, 2001's comic on:
The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "Our CEO says we are poised for huge growth in earnings." The Boss continues, "In an unrelated move, he announced that he will leave the company before any of his stock options vest." Wally and Dilbert look horrified and their ties fly up in front of their faces as The Boss says, "The poor guy will miss all of our growth."
Share April 24, 2002's comic on:
The Boss addresses a meeting, "It's a new reality. If you don't like it, you can leave!" Dilbert raises his hand and asks, "Question: How can we leave reality? Aren't we always in it by definition?" Dilbert looks around and sees that everyone around him is asleep. He says, "Never mind.. apparently everyone else knew what you meant."
Share July 05, 2002's comic on:
The Boss says to Wally, "I'm having these coffee meetings to find out how I can improve morale." Wally responds, "My only problem was that I wasn't drinking enough coffee with you. So now I'm good, thanks." Wally continues, "Promise me you'll never leave this table. I can't go back to the way things were."
Share November 14, 2002's comic on:
Headline: The Short-Timer. Asok asks the short-timer, "How will you leave if you refuse to use any major muscle groups until retirement?" The short-timer responds, "I'm hoping someone will buy me a motorized wheelchair and lift me into it." Asok says, "I would be willing to drag you to the curb." The short-timer responds, "Face up?"
Share April 14, 2003's comic on:
The Boss addresses a meeting, "Our VP is mad because people are leaving work too early." The Boss turns to Alice and says, "If you need to leave early, don't walk past his office. Go to the roof and leap into the 'dumpster' in the alley." The VP sits smugly in his office and thinks, "Leadership triumphs again." Alice can be seen through the window behind him jumping off the roof into the dumpster.
Share October 26, 2004's comic on:
Share April 04, 2006's comic on:
Share May 28, 2000's comic on:
Dilbert walks by an open office door and hears, "Pssst!" Dilbert walks in and says, "Yes?" The Boss says, "Come in and shut the door." The Boss continues, "I bought a fake video surveillance camera." The Boss holds the Boss and says, "Install it in the break room tonight." The Boss continues, "It's cheaper than a real camera and it will discourage thefts." Dilbert says, "If you treat employees like criminals, they'll leave." The Boss says, "Good point. You'd better hide the fake camera so no one knows it's there." Dilbert puts the box in the trash and walks away whistling."