Link To Widget Comic Strips - Page 3
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Catbert is standing on a desk and talking to Dilbert. Catbert says, "We can't pay this week because your position code is misaligned with your module." Catbert continues, "Worse yet, no one knows what that means or whose responsibility it is to fix it." Dilbert says, "Who told you about the problem?" Catbert says, "It was an anonymous note with disappearing ink."
Carol: I just fired off a scathing letter to a columnist for misusing the word "dongle". Im intoxicated with the feeling of verbal superiority. My sad life has meaning , I feel alive! The columnist: Dear Nutbag, Thanks for the input, Heres a link yo a dictionary, I await your apology
Carol: "Hey, I got a response from the newspaper columnist I reamed for misusing the word "dongle."" ""Dear Nutbag... Link to a dictionary..." Um... Oops... It appears that I was wrong." "Now do you apologize?" "Plan B: I accuse him of hating minorities."
Elbonian: Halt! You have entered the territorial mud of North Elbonia! I'll text you a link to a web page about our forced labor camps. You might like them. Dilbert: This looks better than my current job. Elbonian: No rush, but I have an appointment to capture a Canadian at eleven.
"Dilbert, come in here." "I keep clicking on this link and nothing happens." "Click click click click." "See?" "Try something else." "Why would I do that?" "The definition of insanity is: doing the same thing and expecting a different result." "Hey, it worked this time!" "What we have here is a bad precedent." "They called me 'crazy.'"
Dilbert: Heres the technical analysis that you ask for, I don't understand any of it. I can't tell if its right or if it would envbrass me. I can't ask for a second opinion with out looking stupid, and I can't distribute it because it might be wrong, I'll out it on this pile and hope something changes. I wonder of its called whistling when only amor comes out, Carol: Should I shred your pile of indecision, The Boss: make it link like an accident.
Boss: Carol, why did you send me a link about people who like to dress in animal costumes? Carol: It's called the Furry Lifestyle. I thought you might want to try it out. Boss: I'll take a look. Dilbert: What's your end game? Carol: If the Furry thing sticks I'll try to get him to go on a safari.
Boss: I traced all of our problems back to your lack of creativity. You should be creating ideas that change the course of civilization, but instead, you sit there like a lump. Dilbert: I'm sending you a link that describes fun ways to choke yourself.
Wally: Did you get the link I sent about the ten things all leaders need to do? I also sent you an article about the nine habits of successful people. And I sent you an article about the time management tricks used by successful people. According ti my research. There are 17,429 tricks you need to master to be a good leader. That might seem like a lot. But if you master ten per year, you'll be 1.2% competent by the time you retire. Boss: Why are we having this conversation? Wally: Im going to add "Listening skills" to the list.
Dilbert: Did you see the article on the Internet about the five signs you might be a bad boss? Boss: Yeah. About seventy people forwarded it to me. Dilbert: That was number three on the list. Boss: I didn't read it. Dilbert: That was number one.