Search Results for "lunch"
Share March 01, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert and Wally sit at a table eating lunch. Alice walks over and says, "Why is it that I never have time to eat but you MEN are in here every day at 11:35?" Wally replies, "Because the hours we spent upgrading our PCs have finally paid off by greatly improving our efficiency." After Alice has left the table, Dilbert says to Wally, "I thought it was because we get hungry at 11:30?" Wally replies, "We can't reveal all our secrets."
Share November 16, 1996's comic on:
Dilbert and a man sit at a table. Dilbert says, "So tell me . . . Brian . . . Why do you want to work for this company?" The man replies, "Well, to be honest, I don't. I'm using this as a practice interview." Dilbert says, "I guess we're done here." Brian looks at his watch and says, "Hello-o-o!!! It's lunch time and I don't see sandwiches."
Share April 16, 1997's comic on:
The Boss, Wally, Dilbert and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "There's been a lot of joking and grumbling since the company took out life insurance policies on all of you." The Boss continues, "So we're having these catered lunch meetings to discuss your feelings." Carol, the Boss's secretary, brings a bag of food into the room. Carol takes a sandwich out of the bag and asks, "Do you want the mad cow burger or the chicken bone surprise?"
Share April 26, 1997's comic on:
Wally stands behind Alice's desk and says, "Alice, our business plan is in complete disarray so we're taking a three-hour lunch. Want to join us?" Alice replies, "No, I've got to work harder than ever to turn this situation around!" Wally and Dilbert put their coats on and leave. Wally tells Dilbert, "Sometimes it's hard to distinguish between dedication and insanity." Dilbert asks, "Which one are we?"
Share May 31, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert sits across from a man's desk. The man says, "Thanks for your time, Dilbert. It's always good to get the technical perspective." Dilbert says, "Hey, it's lunchtime. Would you like to join me in the cafeteria?" The man replies, "Ooh . . . No, I couldn't do that." The man explains, "I'm on the management track, so I can't be seen eating lunch with you." The man continues, "If I'm seen with an ordinary employee then people will think I'm ordinary." The man continues, "I'd like to eat with the senior executives, but of course they don't want to be seen with me." The man slides under his desk and says, "So I've perfected a method of slipping quietly away at lunch time." Dilbert turns to the reader and says, "The scary part is that someday that man will be my boss."
Share January 05, 1998's comic on:
Dilbert says, "Did you go for a walk at lunch?" The Boss is wearing an over coat. He says, "Not exactly." The Boss hangs his coat on a caot rack and says, "I got a bomb threat. I didn't tell anyone else, just in case it was a hoax. Dilbert says, "It was only yesterday that I was saying my morale couldn't be any lower." The Boss sits behind his desk and says, "I bought a lottery ticket to increase the potential irony."
Share March 18, 1998's comic on:
Tina the tech writer says to Alice, "Alice, one day I hope we can be judged by our accomplishments and not our gender." Alice says, "I got my fourteenth patent today. I'm on my way to a lunch banquet in my honor." Tina says, "And you wore THAT?" Alice frowns in anger."
Share April 13, 1998's comic on:
Ed tells Wally, "I just gave my two-week notice." Wally screams, "Yes! Yes! The arrogant obstructionist bore is history!" Ed says, "Everyone seems to be taking this rather well." Wally shouts, "Count me in for the goodbye lunch!"
Share November 23, 1998's comic on:
Alice sits at lunch with Wally and Dilbert. Alice says, "I'd love my job if not for my slow-witted co-workers." No reaction. Wally says, "Am not." Dilbert turn to Wally and says, "You're drinking my soda again!"
Share October 30, 1994's comic on:
Dilbert: "Exhibit 'A' is my empty lunch bag, last seen full." "Only the people in this room had the motive and the opportunity." "Inspector Dogbert will investigate." Dogbert: "Sniff. You were in the mail room with Willy the mail boy all morning. You are innocent." "Sort of." "Sniff. I give you a 'C+' for hygiene but you did not take the lunch." "Sniff. Bologna...potato chips...carrot sticks...ha!!!" "This is the thief who took the decoy lunch...which we laced with synthetic female hormones!" Wally: "You can't prove anything!" Dogbert: "Is there something you'd like to get off your chest?"