Math Trick Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

144 Results for Math Trick

View 21 - 30 results for math trick comic strips. Discover the best "Math Trick" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 18, 1994's comic on:

Tags #dogbert teaches math, #cut staff, #bonus worth, #expense requiremnets, #calculated, #budget, #multiply by one, #doctor, #flashlight, #projections come from, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dogbert teaches business math." Dogbert points to a diagram of an equation. A picture of Wally, Dilbert and Alice illustrates the equation, "Grunts equals zero." The caption says, "#1. Any job that can be done by two people . . ." The Boss stands behind two people. The caption continues, ". . . Can be done by one person for half the cost." The Boss yanks one of the workers out of his chair. The caption says, "#2. A bonus today is worth more than . . ." The Boss holds a large bag of money. The caption continues, ". . . The whole company tomorrow." An office building has a closed sign on it. The caption says, "#3. Your expense requirements for December can be calculated . . ." The Boss sits at his desk writing on a piece of paper. The caption continues, ". . . By taking what's left in the budget and multiplying by one." A delivery person asks the Boss, "Giraffe goes where?" Dogbert says, "Next week, a doctor with a flashlight shows us where sales projections come from."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 12, 1995's comic on:

Tags #mister catbert, #total compensation plan, #salary alone, #danger, #balances out, #employee benefits, #lower blood pressure, #rubbing soft belly, #trick, #health benefit

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss, Catbert, Dilbert, Alice and Wally sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Mister Catbert will explain our new 'total compensation plan' for excellence." Catbert says, "We no longer view compensation in the narrow terms of salary alone." Dilbert, Alice and Wally think, "Danger! Danger!" Catbert continues, "If employee benefits go up, then salaries can go down and it all balances out." Catbert lies on the table and says, "For example, did you know you could lower your blood pressure by rubbing my soft, furry belly?" Alice says, "It might be a trick!" Wally thinks, "What's the worst thing that could happen?" Wally rubs Catbert's stomach and Catbert shouts, "Ha ha ha!!! It's a health benefit! Now I'll cut everybody's salary!" Dilbert, Alice and Wally look shocked and their hair and clothing is disheveled. Dilbert says, "I've noticed that the more health benefits I get, the worse I feel."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 1997's comic on:

Tags #answer this quiz, #bill gates, #towel boy, #humans are primates, #three monkeys, #stupid trick question

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in a room filled with electronic equipment. A voice coming from a monitor says, "You have been chosen as Bill Gates' towel boy. But first you must answer this quiz." The voice continues, "You're in a room with three monkeys. One has a banana, one has a stick, one has nothing. Which primate is the smartest?" Dilbert says, "Um . . ." Dilbert sits on the couch and Dogbert sits on the backrest. Dogbert says, "I guess the successful towel boys know that humans are primates too." DIlbert says angrily, "Stupid trick question."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 01, 1999's comic on:

Tags #answer phone, #trick question, #meeting, #better get this, #phone rings, #ignores boss call, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss comes up behind Wally who sits at his desk. The boss says, "Wally, I've been calling you for two hours! Why don't you answer your phone?" Wally says, "Is that a trick question?" The boss says, "Wally, unless your in a meeting.." The phone rings. Wally says, "Hold on. I'd better get this."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 13, 2000's comic on:

Tags #gigantic database, #customer behavior, #information, #non linear math, #data mining technology, #optimize retail channels, #spam, #meeting here

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "We have a gigantic database full of customer behavior information." Dilbert says, "Excellent. We can use non-linear math and data mining technology to optimize our retail channels!" The Boss says to Dilbert, "If that's the same thing as spam, we're having a good meeting here."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 2002's comic on:

Tags #boss booked, #highest ratio, #unavailabilty, #usefulness, #sound insulting, #do math, #human resources, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice asks The Boss, "How about any Tuesday this year?" The Boss replies, "No, I'm booked." Alice says, "You have the highest ratio of unavailability to usefulness I've ever seen." The Boss asks Catbert, "Does that sound like an insult?" Catbert replies, "If I could do math I wouldn't be working in human resources."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 2003's comic on:

Tags #management techniques, #existence of books, #which one, #read, #making mad, #trick

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert raises his hand in a meeting and asks, "Question: How do you know which management technique works best?" Dilbert continues, "Logically, doesn't the existence of thousands of management books show that no one knows what works best?" The Boss responds, "The trick is knowing which one to read." Dilbert responds, "Now you're just making me mad."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 2003's comic on:

Tags #tunnel digging, #prototype, #escaped the lab, #perth australia, #combined enity, #cyborg, #popular, #trick with dirt

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "My tunnel-digging prototype escape the lab and burrowed into a picknicker in Perth, Australia." "The combined entity is a cyborg that has proven to be surprisingly popular at parties." "Ha ha! Do the trick with the dirt!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2005's comic on:

Tags #desperate venture capitalist, #math grades, #first idea, #mezzanine funding, #cash bag, #students, #education

View Transcript

Transcript

Vijay, the World's Most Desperate Venture Capitalist "You two have good math grades." $ 8 "If you grow up and marry and produce a little engineer baby, I want to invest in its first idea." "Please don't be too late!" "Dude, we're already looking for mezzanine funding."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 2012's comic on:

Tags #twins, #version of dlibert, #clone, #stylish and cool, #math, #ugly people, #education

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Dilbert, this is Lars. He's a better version of you. This is what you would look like if you were stylish and cool and fun to be with. Dilbert: Can it do math? Man: That will matter on the same day that all the ugly people die.