Misread Social Cues Comic Strips - Page 3

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136 Results for Misread Social Cues

View 21 - 30 results for misread social cues comic strips. Discover the best "Misread Social Cues" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 22, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #class, #career, #social, #life, #engineer, #bonanza, #ladies, #field, #video games, #devices, #non-engineer

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Dilbert stands in front of a classroom of children saying, "And don't forget the social life that comes with being an engineer." Dilbert continues, "Ninety percent of all engineers are guys, so it's a bonanza of dating opportunities for the ladies who enter the field." Dilbert continues, "For the men, there are these little video game devices . . ." A little girl raises her hand and asks, "Would I be allowed to date a non-engineer?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 04, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #date, #guys, #unemployed, #new, #job, #social, #security, #Number, #social security number, #interest, #there

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A woman at a desk tells Dilbert, "Sorry, I don't date guys from work." Dilbert says, "I'll resign . . ." The woman says, "Sorry, I don't date unemployed guys." Dilbert says, "I . . . I'll get a new job . . . One you approve of." The woman says, "Sorry, I don't date guys with your social security number." Back at home, Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dogbert says, "So, it turns out her unlucky number has nine digits in it . . ." Dilbert says, "But she knew my social security number, so I think there's some interest there . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 1996's comic on:


Tags #new smoking habit, #teeth turned yellow, #social outcast, #going broke, #house burned down, #going to quit, #long term view

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Alice asks Wally, "How do you like your new smoking habit?" Wally replies, "My teeth turned yellow, my breath is putrid, I'm a social outcast, I'm going broke, and my house burned down." Alice asks, "So you're going to quit?" Wally replies, "No, I'm trying to take a long term view of it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 17, 1997's comic on:


Tags #four hour meeting, #surrogate social life, #bring chips, #wish, #had a spine

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Tina stands behind Asok's desk and says, "You're invited to a four-hour meeting, Asok." Asok looks at the agenda and says, "Tina, it would seem that all of your meetings have no purpose other than to provide you with a surrogate social life." Tina asks, "Can you bring chips?" Asok says, "I wish, I wish, I wish I had a spine."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 1992's comic on:


Tags #finances, #violence, #Dilbert, #christmas, #social, #life, #mortgage, #gift, #hat, #sale, #yule, #log

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Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I thought you might need help deciding what to get me for Christmas." Dogbert says, "I started by doing a complete analysis of your financial situation." Dogbert continues, "Your utter lack of a social life has resulted in significant cash reserves." Dogbert continues, "That combined with a second mortgage would make $50,000 available for my gift." Dilbert says, "I bought you a hat." Dogbert looks at Dilbert. Dilbert says, "It was on sale." Dogbert walks away saying, "It seems that every year at about this time I feel like beating somebody senseless with a yule log."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 26, 1997's comic on:


Tags #editable wax fruit, #live at desk, #no social life, #social activity, #vending machine food, #marketing network

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During a staff meeting, The Boss says, "It has come to my attention that one of you has a social life." Wally says, "There must be some mistake." The Boss says, "We can't be successful until our social lives are worse than the industry average." He stands up and says, "Our competitors spend the nights in their cubicles. They eat from vending machines." The Boss walks behind Wally, Dilbert and Alice. He says, "Someone here has not shown the same level of competetive spirit." The Boss grabs Asok by the collar and says, "Someone had a social activity last night!" Asok cries, "I'm sorry! I thought they were friends... but they were only recruiting for a multi-level marketing network!!!" Dilbert says, "What were they selling?" Asok says, "Edible wax fruit. Brochure?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 25, 2000's comic on:


Tags #social misfits, #keep him away, #normal people, #engineering liason

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Dilbert sits at his computer working. The Boss approaches with a new employee. The Boss says to the new employee, "Dilbert is one of our social misfits." The Boss says to the new employee, "Your job is to keep him away from normal people." Dilbert, still facing his computer is obviously annoyed by what he is hearing. Unable to keep quiet, Dilbert yells without turning around, "Hello! I'm right here!" The Boss and the new employee unaffected by Dilbert's outburst, continue their conversation. The Boss says to the new employee, "Your title will be Engineering Liason."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 2001's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #monday morning, #travel all day, #stealing life, #reschedule, #social plans, #business

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The Boss sits behind his desk and says, "I told them you would be at the meeting Monday morning." Dilbert says, "What?? That means I have to travel all day Sunday. You're stealing my life!" Dilbert sits on the couch in his robe eating. He turns to Dogbert and says, "Then he said if I had social plans he'd reschedule." Dogbert replies, "Ouch."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2003's comic on:


Tags #makes me happy, #exoskleton, #bad job, #social life, #chemicals, #illusion, #engineer, #soul, #therapy, #psychology, #engineering

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Dilbert is lying on a therapist's couch in an exoskeleton. He says, "My medication makes me happy despite my exoskeleton, bad job, and social life." Dilbert continues, "If chemicals can change the way I think and what I enjoy, then free will must be an illusion." The therapist asks, "What about your soul?" Dilbert responds, "I'm an engineer."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 12, 2003's comic on:


Tags #evil hr director, #hire, #job interview, #urine sample, #social secuirty, #past emplyers, #past lovers, #despicable

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Headline: Evil H.R. Director. Catbert says to an interviewee, "I need to check a few things before we hire you." Catbert continues, "Give me blood, hair and urine samples, fingerprints, social- security number, past employers, and past lovers." The Boss and Catbert are meeting. The Boss is looking over the interviewee's records. The Boss asks, "Before we started doing all of this checking, did you know that everyone in the world was despicable?" Catbert replies, "Yes."