Morons On Parade Comic Strips - Page 3
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49 Results for Morons On Parade
View 21 - 30 results for morons on parade comic strips. Discover the best "Morons On Parade" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday March 29,
2004
Tags televison show, doctor dogbert, lazy, immoral, fat morons
Transcript
"I plan to start my own television talk show." "I'll change my name to 'Doctor Dogbert' so people think I'm qualified to call them lazy, immoral fat morons." "You already call people those names." "Yeah, but I want them to thank me for it."
Saturday September 18,
2004
Tags people bothering, trying to work, get away, morons, unpleasant realization
Transcript
Wally: Have you ever noticed that people continuously bother you when you're trying to work? Thats why I come here - to get away from those morons. wally: Im having an unpleasant realization. Dilbert: They're all like that.
Friday October 08,
2004
Tags problem, plan, negativity, only person, my theory, rest, morons, sober, drunk
Transcript
"I see a problem with your plan." "Oh, do you, Mr. Negativity?" "Why is it that you're the o-o-o-only person in this meeting to see a problem? Huh? Huh?" "My theory is that the rest of you are either morons or drunk." "I am totally sober!"
Thursday January 18,
2007
Tags password recovery, morons, forgot password, nostrildogmas, messed password, psychic
Transcript
Dogbert's password recovery service for morons Ned: I done forgot my password. Dogbert: What's your name? Ned: My name is Ned, I think. Is your password 'Ned'? Ned: Sweet baby jeepers, you're like some sort of Nostrildogmas!" Dogbert: Here's a brochure for my cult.
Monday April 02,
2007
Tags ceo, eliminate dept, what do we do, explain things, morons
Transcript
The boss: Our CEO wants to eliminate our department because he doesn't know what we do. "I need someone to tell me what we do so I can tell him." Dilbert: "We explain things to morons." The Boss: "Should I be writing this down?"
Sunday October 14,
2001
Tags meeting, vague intrsutcions, morons annonymous, pandemonium, ends, shoe sniffing contest, mom called, arguments, business
Transcript
The Boss approaches Carol and says, "Carol, if anyone calls, say I'm in a meeting." Carol asks, "What meeting?" The Boss replies, "It doesn't matter." Carol thinks, "#O!* vague instructions" as the phone rings. Carol says into the phone, "He's at his weekly meeting of 'Morons Anonymous.' She continues on the phone, "It's a long meeting. They usually get into an argument about the definition of 'anonymous.' She continues on the phone, "Half of them think it means 'angry.' Then someone throws a chair and it's pandemonium." She continues on the phone, "The whole thing usually ends with a shoe-sniffing contest." The Boss returns to Carol's desk. She says, "Your mom called."
Saturday August 17,
2013
Tuesday February 20,
2018
Not Morons
Tags marketing, tag line, slogan, name-calling, insult, obliviousness, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Is it too late to rethink our new marketing slogan? When we say, "We're Not A Bunch Of Morons," it kinds sounds to my ears as if we are. Boss: But it says we're not. Dilbert: And you're not a rat-faced waste of oxygen. Boss: Thank you.
Tuesday March 17,
2020
Hiring Morons
Tags managers & supervisors, technology, business, technical, job, market, hire, moron, critical
Transcript
boss: the job market is so hot right now that we can only afford to hire morons. dilbert: how will we fill our critical technical jobs? boss: i just told you.
Saturday February 25,
2012
Tags meetings, public speaking, powerpoint slides, intelligent viwers, manipulative anecdotes, boss died, praise employees
Transcript
Dilbert: My PowerPoint slides have a little something for everyone. For my intelligent viewers, I have data, and for the morons, I have manipulative anecdotes. Which reminds me-- did you hear about the boss who died because he didn't praise his employee?