Next Emplyee Comic Strips - Page 3
584 Results for Next Emplyee
View 21 - 30 results for next emplyee comic strips. Discover the best "Next Emplyee" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share July 28, 1996's comic on:
The caption says, "The Budget Trap." The Boss says, "I need a quick estimate for how much your next project will cost, Wally." Wally replies, "How should I know? You haven't even told me what my next project is." The Boss says, "That's okay. I only need a rough estimate for planning purposes." Wally says, "I see where this is going. You're going to turn my wild guess into a budget. Later I'll be blamed when it's wrong." The Boss replies, "No, no. I won't hold you to these numbers." Wally says, "Well . . . Okay, let's say two million dollars." The Boss says as he walks away, "Ooh . . . Can't afford that. I'll put you down for twenty thousand dollars." The caption says, "One year later . . ." The Boss sits at his desk and says to Wally, "You're way over budget. Can you show me the cause?" Wally replies, "It depends. Can mirrors reflect your image?"
Share May 21, 1999's comic on:
Dilbert takes his coat off at home. Dilbert says, to dogbert, "My date tried to run away, but I attached a tracking device to her coat." Dilbert holds a microphone and site by his computer. Dilbert says, "Now I'll just compromise a spy satellite and a radio network." Dilbert's date lies in bed at her house. Her radio says, "....So id next weekend is good, nod once."
Share March 23, 2000's comic on:
Dilbert introduces the future Dilbert to Alice: "Alice, this is me from the future." Alice says: "Hi." The future Dilbert tells Dilbert: "At the next holiday party, she's all over you." Dilbert asks the future Dilbert as they are walking away: "Is that true?" The future Dilbert answers: "No, but after today she never drank again."
Share April 14, 2000's comic on:
Alice says to Dilbert as they walk, "I'd quit this job, but next year I'll get an extra week of vacation." Dilbert replies, "If you get an extra week for every ten years of services..." Dilbert continues, "...you'll be happy in 480 years. Good plan." Alice replies, not humored "Shut up."
Share April 30, 2001's comic on:
Wally, sitting between the boss and Dilbert, says, "My next generation internet project is right on schedule." Wally says, "It'll be done sometime in the next generation." Wally continues, "If you know any cute single women with low standards, it would really help."
Share December 04, 2001's comic on:
The Boss approaches Carol at her desk and says, "Carol, reserve the conference room every day for the next day in case I need it." Carol responds, "You're too late. Some other sociopath had the same idea and beat you to it." As The Boss walks away he thinks to himself, "I hate being the slowest sociopath."
Share April 03, 2002's comic on:
The Boss says into a microphone, "Our next speaker was a famous athlete until drugs and booze ruined his life." A shaky, disheveled man walks towards The Boss and says, "Shank Hew Vewy Mush." Alice turns to The Boss and says, "It's not inspirational until he stops doing those things." The Boss asks, "What?"
Share November 01, 2002's comic on:
Headline: Dogbert the Attorney. Dogbert raises his hand and says, "Your honor, is it too late to change sides?" Dogbert continues, "After hearing the evidence, I want to punish my client." After a pause, Dogbert asks, "No?" The Boss glares at Dogbert. Dogbert continues, "I expect some awkward silences during the next break."
Share April 29, 2003's comic on:
Dilbert is at home. He says to Dogbert, "I'm seeing signs that I might get laid off." Dogbert responds, "It's probably your imagination. Just ignore them." Catbert and The Boss are hanging an arrow-shaped sign that reads, "You might be next" on Dilbert's cubicle. Catbert says, "I have to admit that I like it when they're jumpy."
Share June 21, 2003's comic on:
The Boss stands at a podium and says, "The 'Employee of the Year' Award goes to.. no one." The Boss' voice continues, "Thanks for coming. Better luck next year." Dilbert and Wally are walking out. Dilbert says, "It's not as bad as the time that you won it." Wally responds, "Jealousy is unattractive."