No Actual Work Comic Strips - Page 3
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1000 Results for No Actual Work
View 21 - 30 results for no actual work comic strips. Discover the best "No Actual Work" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday September 14,
2016
Only Work If You'd Rather Do Something Else
Tags #fulfillment, #happiness, #satisfaction, #work ethic, #motivation, #psychology
Transcript
Boss: Remember, it's only work if you'd rather be doing something else! Tina: I would rather do anything else. Boss: Oh. In that case, you're trapped in a nightmare that never ends. Tina: I have a lot riding on the afterlife.
Thursday October 13,
2016
Boss Wants Alice To Be His Work Wife
Tags #wife, #spouse, #work, #creep, #relationships, #repulsive
Transcript
Boss: I decided to call you my work-wife. Alice: Gurk. I"m creeped out! I'm creeped out! I'm creeped out! Boss: Just like at home. Alice: I need a shower.
Thursday October 27,
2016
Alice Takes On More Work
Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #workload, #philosophy, #semantics
Transcript
Alice: Why do I keep taking on more work while you do noting? Wally: That's because you optimize for productivity, while I optimize for my happiness. Alice: That makes you a freeloader. Wally: I prefer the label "happy winner."
Monday November 14,
2016
Wally's Work Life Balance
Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #excuse
Transcript
Wally: I can't do your urgent task because I'm on deadline for my boss. I can't meet your deadline because I have an urgent task from a co-worker. I finally figured out the whole "work-life balance" thing.
Thursday January 19,
2017
Wally's Red File Gets Him Out Of Work
Tags #laziness, #ruse, #work ethic, #deception, #excuse
Transcript
Wally: I'd love to help you, but I'm busy working on the red file. Woman: Is the red file a real thing or just a thing you say to get out of work? Wally: It's all the same on your end.
Friday February 24,
2017
Taking Pride In Work
Tags #motivation, #pep talk, #logic, #pride, #suffering, #work ethic
Transcript
Boss: Wally, I"m starting to think you don't take pride in your work. Wally: That would be like taking pride in being the victim of a crime. Catbert: How'd the pep talk go? Boss: He made some good points.
Wednesday June 28,
2017
Two Choices For Work Space
Tags #office, #office workers, #cubicle, #distraction, #work from home
Transcript
Boss: We're trying to decide if it's better to have an open office plan with too many distractions to be productive... or soul-crushing cubicles that will make every employee envy the dead. Dilbert: Maybe everyone can just work from home? Boss: And miss all of this?
Friday August 11,
2017
Wally Pretends To Work
Tags #laziness, #work ethic
Transcript
Wally: If you need me, I'll be at my desk pretending to work. Alice: How long do you think you can get away with that? Wally: I wondered the same thing for the first fifteen years or so.
Thursday November 16,
2017
Work Until You Drop
Tags #health, #monitor, #fitbit, #energy, #surveillance, #wearable tech, #dedication, #work ethic
Transcript
Boss: Your health tracker says you are leaving work at the end of each day with energy to spare. That's exactly like stealing from the company. Dilbert: You want me to work until I drop? Boss: I'm not allowed to say that directly.
Friday June 08,
2018
Good Day At Work
Tags #work, #morale, #engagment, #boredom, #anger, #frustration
Transcript
Dogbert: How's work? Dilbert: On a good day, the frustration and anger solve for the boredom. Dogbert: What's a bad day like? Dilbert: Same as a good day but with more questions.