Ouija Board Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

92 Results for Ouija Board

View 21 - 30 results for ouija board comic strips. Discover the best "Ouija Board" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 12, 2005's comic on:

Tags #board meeting, #outsourcing, #ceo job, #26 million, #elbonian ceo, #good guy, #consulting contract

View Transcript

Transcript

Board Meeting "I recommend outsourcing your CEO's job and saving the company $26 million per year." "For $4 per year you can hire an Elbonian CEO who is just as good as this guy." "Now do you understand why you should have renewed my consulting contract?"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2005's comic on:

Tags #web service satndards, #consortium, #approval review, #executive board, #review borad

View Transcript

Transcript

"We should join the industry consortium that's promoting web services standards." "Run that past the consortium approval review board and get a sign-off from the executive board of review board reviewers." "Do those exist?" "In a perfect world, yes."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 2008's comic on:

Tags #project, #stink of unimportnace, #interns, #board of directors, #insult

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I finished my project and I'm ready to present it to the board of directors. The Boss: Interns don't speak to the board of directors, Asok. It would be considered an insult. Asok: How is that an insult? The Boss: You have the stink of unimportance.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 2008's comic on:

Tags #board of directors, #ceo, #hired mole, #intern request, #janitor, #mole, #pulling rank, #rat, #rodent, #senior vp

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Who will present my findings to the board of directors?" The Boss: They only listen to the CEO. And he only listens to the senior vice presidents, and they only listen to the... Asok: Could you show this to the janitor for me?" RatBert: Whoa! Whoa! You don't talk to me directly!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 18, 2008's comic on:

Tags #board of directors, #underling, #powerpoint, #slides, #preoccupied, #day jobs, #mistresses, #bonus, #meeting, #ceo, #all in favor, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

CEP presents to the board of directors CEO: An underling made these powerpoint slides and I don't understand them. But it doesn't matter because all of you are too preoccupied with your day jobs and mistresses to pay attention. Who votes to give me a huge bonus just to end this meeting?" Aye Aye Aye

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 2008's comic on:

Tags #inmtern, #ceo, #powerpoint slides, #board of directors, #bonus, #luck, #tenuous connections, #hopeful

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Our CEO didn't understand the powerpoint slides you made for him, so he asked the board of directors for a bonus. With any luck, the bonus will incent him to try harder to understand your slides. I'm getting better at finding tenuous connections to hope.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2010's comic on:

Tags #meeting, #letter, #ceo, #reading, #good fortune, #share, #winery, #wine, #angry, #helicopters, #human chess board, #frighten, #dwarves, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Our CEO wants to share his good fortune with all employees." The Boss says, "He invites all of you to visit his winery and buy his non-award-winning wine at nearly retail prices." The Boss says, "He asks that you not park your helicopters near his human chess board because it frightens the dwarves."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 2007's comic on:

Tags #set up meeting, #review board, #new technologies, #decide, #answer question

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: "Carol, set up a meeting with the technology review board to decide how we'll decide on new technologies." Carol: "Do you also need a meeting to decide how you will put together a meeting to decide how to decide things?" "Maybe I should get some people together to help you answer that question." The Boss: "Maybe."

Board Offers Dogbert Severence Package

Thank you for voting.
Board Offers Dogbert Severence Package - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 20, 2014's comic on:

Tags #avarice, #compensation, #executives, #golden parachute, #greed, #money, #wages

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO. Catbert: The board has approved a $100 million golden parachute if you quit now. Dogbert: $100 million?!!! How am I supposed to live on that? You insult me! Catbert: That's a lot of money for doing nothing. Dogbert: Bah! I spend more than that on soft cheese.

Pipe Down, Coffee Intern

Thank you for voting.
Pipe Down, Coffee Intern - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 20, 2015's comic on:

Tags #board meeting, #change, #coffee, #demotion, #ego, #ideas, #Promotion, #intern, #new ideas

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Is it wise to ride your coffee intern to a board meeting? Wally: Pipe down, coffee intern. If you were capable of thinking like a leader, you would be a VP too. Dilbert: Demoted already? Wally: The board does not like new ideas.