Preventer Of Info Comic Strips - Page 3

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41 Results for Preventer Of Info

View 21 - 30 results for preventer of info comic strips. Discover the best "Preventer Of Info" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 03, 1997's comic on:


Tags #every department, #create web page, #internal network, #include enough info, #security precaution

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The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Every department is required to create a Web page for our internal network." The Boss continues, "It should include enough information to be difficult to maintain, but not so much that it's useful." The Boss continues, "As a security precaution, we'll make it too dull and unorganized to read." Wally asks, "Is pornography in or out?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 18, 1998's comic on:


Tags #info meerical, #invest savings, #sell educational info, #avoid scams, #phase two

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Dilbert sits at his computer, hand on the mouse. Dogbert stands on the desk and says, "I'm going to make an infomercial." Dogbert starts wagging his tail and says, "I'm targeting the people who want to invest their savings, but don't know how." Dilbert says, "I hope you plan to sell educational information about how to avoid scams." Dogbert says, "Good idea for phase two!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 24, 1998's comic on:


Tags #meeting objectives, #accuracy of info, #facts, #guilty person

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Alice says, "Who said I wasn't meeting my objectives?" The Boss says, "I can't rememeber." Alice grimaces. The Boss says, "Therefore, I have no reason to doubt the accuracy of the information." Alice says, "Check the facts!" The Boss says, "That sounds like something a guilty person would say."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 05, 2000's comic on:


Tags #mordac, #preventer, #information services, #web mistress, #firewall inadequate, #talk cobol baby

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Mordac approaches Ming and says, "I am Mordac, the preventor of information services!" Ming replies, "I am web mistress Ming!" Mordac says to Ming, "Your firewall is inadequate. You must be punished!" Ming responds, "Your HTML is weak! You must be punished!" Mordac holds Ming in his arms tilting her backward and says, "I must have you!" Ming replies, "Talk Cobol to me, baby."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 1999's comic on:


Tags #mordac, #information services, #preventer, #computer, #pda, #catbird intervenes, #human rsources, #nework cable, #technology

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Mordac bursts into Dilbert's cubicle. Mordac says, "I am Mordac. the preventor of information services!" Mordac says, "I'll take your computer and your little PDA too!" Dilbert hugs his monitor. Mordac says, "Do you recognize this?" Mordac holds up a wire. Dilbert says, "Aaaagh! That's my network cable!" Dilbert says, "What do you want from me?!" Catbert leans over the cubicle wall. Catbert says, "Mordac, it is I catbert, the evil director of human resources!" Catbert jumps down onto Mordac. Catbert says, "You made my personal printer a shared device!" Dilbert watches a clothing flies. Dilbert is at home and says, to Dogbert, "Two wrongs made a right." Dogbert says, "Welcome to my reality."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2002's comic on:


Tags #downsized, #info, #last day, #projects, #right away, #soon enough, #90 days

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The Boss hands Dilbert a stack of papers and says, "Here are some projects to finish before your last day." Dilbert responds, "But.. I'll have to interact with people who know I've been downsized." The Boss replies, "Hee Hee!" A coworker mocks Dilbert, "I'll get this information to you right away. Is ninety days soon enough?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 23, 2002's comic on:


Tags #dilbert sales guy, #Card, #no correct info, #new ones, #costs money, #clout, #company, #buy something, #business

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Headline: Dilbert the Sales Guy. Dilbert hands a customer his card and says, "Here's my card. None of this information is correct." The customer asks, "Why don't you get new ones?" Dilbert responds, "That costs money." The customer adds, "You must have a lot of clout in your company." Dilbert responds, "Shut up and buy something."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 2003's comic on:


Tags #dating, #party, #phone number, #information, #email, #voicemail, #home phone, #offcie, #work email, #personal website, #too much info, #skeleton, #relationships

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"I've never done this before, but may I have your phone number?" "Home phone.. cell phone.. work phone.. home e-mail.... personal web site." "...And if that fax machine is out of paper, try the one down the hall, but leave me a voice mail if you do."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 02, 2004's comic on:


Tags #energy, #million dollar salary, #secreatry, #shareholder meeting, #spank, #stock options, #turned ugly, #beat up, #bandages, #health

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CEO: The shareholder meeting turned ugly when I said we used all the profits to give ourselves stock options. They don't understand that I wouldn't work as hard if all I got was my million dollar case salary. Id barely have the energy ti spans my secretary. The boss: Too much info

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 01, 2005's comic on:


Tags #da vinci code, #excluding parts, #information etchnology, #mordac, #preventor

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"I am Mordac, the preventer of information technology, and I have assigned you a new password." "What is it?" "Click click" "It's the full text of 'The Da Vinci Code,' excluding the parts I don't believe." "I'm not touching you." "Stupid scenery descriptions!"