Should Report Comic Strips - Page 3

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934 Results for Should Report

View 21 - 30 results for should report comic strips. Discover the best "Should Report" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 1993's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #report, #sentence, #micro-robotics, #dead-end, #technology, #opposite, #confusing, #senseless, #scenario, #win-win

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Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Good report . . . But add a sentence that says micro-robotics is a dead-end technology." Dilbert replies, "But that's the exact opposite of my point! If I add that, the whole report would be a confusing and senseless waste of time!" The Boss says, "That's okay. We just won't let anybody else see it." Dilbert asks, "Is this a win-win scenario?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 25, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #business report

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Dilbert hands the Boss a document and says, "Here's my time report, in fifteen minute increments." Dilbert says, "And here's my monthly project status, my budget forecast, my key accomplishments, my jeopardy list . . ." The Boss thinks as Dilbert walks away, "Never has so little been measured so much."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 1994's comic on:


Tags #emphasize positive, #french staellite, #trending downward, #upbeat, #war with france, #project staus

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dilberts letter: "Project status: We accidentally destroyed the French satellite and are now at war with France." Elbonian: "Maybe you should be a little more upbeat in your report. Emphasize the positive." letter: "...on a positive note, our headcount expenses are trending downward."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 14, 1994's comic on:


Tags #project dew drop, #test report, #explodes, #beta trial, #friendly customers, #killed, #friendly ones, #project ducky

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The Boss: I agreed to ship Project 'Dewdrop' to some customers for beta testing. Dilbert: Didn't you read my test report? Dewdrop explodes when you plug it in. The Boss: we'll limit the beta trial to friendly customers. Dilbert: we killed all the friendly ones with project ducky.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 14, 1994's comic on:


Tags #huge time saver, #final consulting, #company, #deadweight, #employees.fired, #company directory, #business

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Ratbert: Here's my final consulting report on your company. Ive listed all the deadweight employees who should be fired. The Boss: This is the company directory. Ratbert: Finding that was a huge time saver.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 04, 1994's comic on:


Tags #baywatch, #morale is low, #talk of mutiny, #project staus report, #death to boss, #pointy haired one

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Dilbert: Here's my daily project status report. Morale is low. There is talk of mutiny. we dream of quitting and becoming lifeguards on "Baywatch" Death to the pointy haired one. The Boss: Holy Cow! "Baywatch' is hiring??!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 1994's comic on:


Tags #management fast tracker, #deliver big report, #ceo, #fax, #shredder, #tricked, #punked, #contempt

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"Hey, Matt. How's our favorite management fast-tracker?" "Great! I've got two minutes to deliver my big report to our CEO. Can you tell me where the fax is?" "Oops, I'm wrong. That's the shredder." "He'll go far in this company." "Bzzzzp."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 1994's comic on:


Tags #prepare reports, #outsourced jobs, #write report, #outsourcing, #illogical

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The Boss: "I want all of you to prepare reports explaining why your jobs shouldn't be outsourced to consultants." "It is my job to write this report. But if I were a consultant it would make no sense to compare me to myself. Outsourcing is illogical." "For some reason, I'm not taking as much pride in my work lately."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1994's comic on:


Tags #project report, #thick binder, #foot rest, #annual performance, #appraisel

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Dilbert stands in front of the Boss's desk and says, "Did you see my project report yet? It's in a big thick binder." The Boss replies, "I'm using it as a footrest." Dilbert arrives at home carrying a briefcase and says to Dogbert, "You never want to hear the words 'footrest' the day before your annual performance appraisal."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 1994's comic on:


Tags #self mangled team, #vital tasks, #staus report, #kiss some butts, #track your time

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The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "I'm going to make your group a 'self-managed team.'" The Boss continues, "All of the vital management tasks that I've been doing will now be shared among you." Dilbert says to Wally and Alice, "Stop your work and give me a status report." Alice says, "Track your time." Wally says, "I think I'll kiss some butts."