Super Intelligent Species Comic Strips - Page 3

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69 Results for Super Intelligent Species

View 21 - 30 results for super intelligent species comic strips. Discover the best "Super Intelligent Species" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 24, 1998's comic on:


Tags #boss replaced, #highly intelligent alien, #held captive, #hideous aliem prison, #just an observation

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Dogbert sitting on the couch. Dilbert sitting on floor. Dilbert says, "Apparently my boss has been replaced by a highly intelligent alien." Dilbert faces Dogbert and continues, "That means my real boss is being held captive in some sort of hideous alien prison." Dogbert asks, "What do you plan to do about it?" Dilbert replies, "It was just an observation."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 1996's comic on:


Tags #accordingly, #decrease details, #greetings, #increase lies, #more funding, #need more funding, #variety super powers, #senior vice president

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The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Our senior vice president will be dropping in today." The Boss holds up a chart showing "lies" and "boss level." He says, "Remember to increase your lies accordingly." The Boss holds up a chart showing "details" and "boss level." He says, "And decrease the details you provide." The Boss continues, "If I think you're being too informative, I'll signal by fidgeting." The Boss continues, "Just say everything is fine, but we need more funding. Here he comes." The senior VP stands in the doorway and says, "Sorry I'm late. How is everyone?" Wally replies, "I'm not saying." Dilbert replies, "I'm fine, but I need more funding." Alice replies, "I have a wide variety of super powers." The senior VP thinks, "I feel a sudden, urgent need to unload my stock options." The Boss waves his arms and thinks, "Fidget fidget."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 23, 1999's comic on:


Tags #putting you on team, #intelligent, #highly motivated, #stubborn, #dumb guy, #v neck sweater

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The boss sstands in Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Dilbert, I'm putting you on a team." The boss says, "You'll be working with other intelligent, highly motivated people plus..." The boss puts his arm around a tall cave man looking man and says, "A stubborn dumb guy with a v-neck sweater."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 2001's comic on:


Tags #creep, #super powers of creep, #sexy, #oomp, #flirt with alice, #creep and alice

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The feature creep Creep: Being a feature creep is like having a super power. Thats what makes me so sexy. Alice: comp Creep: That romp sound just bought you a new feature, missy,

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 2001's comic on:


Tags #discovered oil, #wild life perserve, #elbonian, #endangered species, #no impact, #drilled unicorn, #dead, #animals, #drill fields

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The Boss: we've discovered oil in the Elbonian wild life preserve. DOnt worry about the endangered species. Our drilling will have no impact. ELbonian: oops

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 2001's comic on:


Tags #oil wells, #albanian wild life preserve, #extinction, #seven species, #useless, #species, #eat and grunt

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The boss is giving a presentation as he points to a slide of a dead animal. The boss says, "Our oil wells in the Elbonian Wildlife Preserve have caused the extinction of seven species." The boss continues, "Luckily, they were useless species who did nothing but eat and grunt." Wally is sitting beside Dilbert, eating a doughnut and grunting, "Mm..mm..mm.."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 21, 2001's comic on:


Tags #dating attractive men, #dumb self centered, #intelligent homely guy, #gym, #free weights, #girl talk, #Dilbert, #Women

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Two women are at the gym. The dark haired says to the light haired, "I'm tired of dating attractive men who are dumb and self-centered." The dark haired continues, "Maybe I can find an intelligent homely guy and clean him up." The light haired exclaims, "No!!!" Dilbert approaches the women and asks, "Do you mind if I work in a set with those five-pounders?" The dark haired looks at Dilbert from the corner of her eye and smiles. The light haired screams, "Don't do it, Amber!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 28, 2002's comic on:


Tags #last kid picked, #team sports, #school, #two people, #super power, #breakroom, #coffee break, #education

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Asok and Wally are at the coffee machine. Wally says to Asok, "In school, I was always the last kid picked to be on a team." Alice enters and says, "I need two people right now. I'll take Asok and.. I'll keep looking." Asok asks Wally, "So it's like a super power?" Wally replies, "Pretty much."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 19, 2003's comic on:


Tags #100 hrs a week, #ask for raise, #top secret facilit, #super genius, #resume, #honest, #take one, #know one

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An interviewee says to The Boss, "If you hire me, I'll work a hundred hours a week and never ask for a raise!" The interviewee continues, "I went to school at a top-secret facility for super geniuses; that's why it's not on my resume." The Boss says to Catbert, "And I'm sure it's all true because he says he's honest!" Catbert replies, "Apparently it doesn't take one to know one."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 2005's comic on:


Tags #intermediate species, #hominid, #oyster, #light sensitive blob, #serious pearl

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"Your resume says you're some kind of intermediary species." "That's right." "I'm halfway between hominid and oyster. Someday I hope my light-sensitive blob will become an eye!" "I don't think we can use you." "Oh, man, you're giving me a serious pearl."