Synthetic Female Hormones Comic Strips - Page 3

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View 21 - 30 results for synthetic female hormones comic strips. Discover the best "Synthetic Female Hormones" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rejected by accounting, #emptiness, #shallow, #validate, #pathetic exitsence, #fear this up, #philosophy

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A female employee hands a document to Dilbert and says, "Your report was rejected by accounting." Dilbert asks, "Why?" The woman responds, "Because the emptiness of their shallow lives makes them want to hurt others in order to validate their pathetic existence." Dilbert asks the woman, "Can you help me clear this up?" She responds, "To be honest, I'm kinda buying in to their philosophy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineers, #field support people, #inferior technology, #most attractive feamle, #prodcuts

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Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table with a sales rep. As they look through some folders, the woman says, "On one hand, my company does use inferior technology in our products . . ." The salesperson continues, "But on the other hand, I'm the most attractive female who has paid attention to you this year." Dilbert responds angrily, "What kind of engineers do you think we are??!" Wally asks, "Do you have pictures of your field support people?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #dinosaur, #fish, #with, #legs, #life, #form, #work, #hard, #part, #mate, #Kids, #mutants, #arm, #dangerfield

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Dogbert walks in the park. A fish with legs comes walking down the path. The fish says, "Howdy!" Dogbert says, "I've never seen a fish with legs." The fish explains, "I'm evolving into a higher life form." Dogbert says, "That sounds like a lot of work." The fish says, "Yeah . . . The hard part is finding a mate who isn't turned off by legs." The fish continues, "With any luck, the kids will be mutants too." The fish continues, "I'm hoping they'll have arms but not look too much like Rodney Dangerfield." The fish stands at the edge of a pond. He tells a female fish, "These legs are a natural advantage!" The female says, "Oh, that's original."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #recruiting on campus, #twelve comapnies, #copies, #resume, #true tables, #interview, #interviewee

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Recruiting on Campus The female college student says, "I have better offers from twelve companies. Whay should I work at yours?" Dilbert stares blankly. The college student walks away, "I'll see what I can do for you." Dilbert says, "Do you have enough copies of my resume?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #large dart, #preservation, #spotted chipmunk, #tranquilize male, #write newsletter, #dead chipmunk, #jokes

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Dilbert: I joined the spotted chipmunk preservation society. We're going to tranquilize the last known male and unite it with a female. Wally: There he is! POW! THUNK! Wally: When you think about it, thats an awfully large dart to use on a chipmunk. woman: Its Dilberts turn to write the newsletter. Dogbert: Trust me, Humor is the way to go, It eases tension. Dilbert: Yeah, but the whole issue of dead chipmunk jokes?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #internet start up, #engineer, #interview, #tv show, #hot internet start up, #engineering

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Wally is being interviewed on tv. The female news anchor says, "Wally, tell our viewers how your internet start-up got so hot." Wally says, "Beats me. I was wondering how YOU got so hot. I'm burning up over here!" The interviewer says, "It says here you were an engineer." Wally says, "Is my ponytail doing anything for you?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #idiots, #i quit, #higher paying job, #miles away, #adios, #web designer, #hear your idiots, #ethernet

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Dilbert, the boss and a male employee are sitting at a table. The employee who has a lap-top in front of him says: "You're all idiots. I quit!" The male employee is typing on his lap-top and says: "There ... I found a higher paying job two miles away. Adios, suckers." A female employee standing between Dilbert and the boss says: "I'm the new web designer. I hear you're idiots. Where's the ethernet jack?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #working for tips, #rfp, #spec binder

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Holding a binder in his hands, Wally thinks, "I hate working for tips." A female employee says, "No, I ordered the R.F.P." Wally says to the employee, "Maybe you were thinking R.F.P. but you said spec binder, you arrogant cow!" The employee grimaces as she holds the binder and Wally thinks, "With any luck, she'll say, 'You had me at cow'."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #83% spat, #customer satisfaction survey, #the lucky ones, #died of dehydration, #results of survey

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A female employee says to The Boss and Wally, "The results of our customer satisfaction survey are in." The female employee says, "83% spat at their telephones until they died of dehydration." Asok the Intern, The Boss and Wally listen as the female employee continues, "We're calling that group 'The Lucky Ones'."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pristine beauty, #elbonia, #see first, #protestors, #stop drilling signs, #protesting drilling, #beauty, #health

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The boss is facing protesters who are carrying signs with a peace sign and a slogan, "Stop Drilling." A protester says, "You're ruining the pristine beauty of Elbonia!" The boss holds up a picture of a barren tree. The boss says, "This is a picture of pristine Elbonia." The protesters are putting the signs in the trunk of a car. A female protester says, "..And then you said, 'It doesn't matter if we see it first.' Then I said..."