Use Walkie Talkie Comic Strips - Page 3
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622 Results for Use Walkie Talkie
View 21 - 30 results for use walkie talkie comic strips. Discover the best "Use Walkie Talkie" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday April 10,
1999
Tags #ease of use, #lab, #budget for staff, #two sided, #photocopies, #live by sword, #die by sword
Transcript
The boss, wally and Asok sit at the conference table with papers in front of them. The boss says, "I downsised the "ease of use" lab because there's no budget for a staff." Asok grabs one of the paper and shows it the the boss. ASok says, "They HAVE a buget. I put it on the back of these two-sided photocopies!" The boss says, "Well, they lived by the sword, and they died by the sword."
Thursday May 06,
1999
Tags #reliable computer, #use software, #poing a spoon, #hole in back, #doing it worng
Transcript
Dilmom is at a computer store. The salesman says, "This is our most reliable computer, unless you try to use software." The salesman says, "It'll freeze several times a day. But you can restart it by poking a spoon into a hole in the back." Dilbert's mom says, "Has that ever worked?" The salesman says, "We think people are doing it wrong."
Saturday May 15,
1999
Tags #completes portion, #project, #well engineered, #squadron, #idiots, #ruin, #marketing, #napping, #use ears, #coasters, #business
Transcript
Dilbert types at his computer and thinks, "This completes my portion of the project." Dilbert thinks, "This project is so well-engineered it would take a squadron of idiots to ruin it." Caption: "Meanwhile in Marketing" A stupid looking man dressed very sloppily says, "And when I'm napping, it is NOT okay to use my ears as coasters."
Thursday May 27,
1999
Tags #new office rebel, #nice bathrobe, #easily manipulated, #dare you, #use barnding, #the fire
Transcript
The male office rebel with the spiked hair extends shakes Dilbert's hand and says, "You must be the new office rebel we heard about. Nice bathrobe." The other pierced male rebel says, "We're called rebels because we're easily manipulated into doing stupid things." Spiked hair rebel raises the roof and says, "Give it up fpr us! Whoo whoo!" Dilbert says, "I dare you to use branding irons on each other right now." Spiked haired says, "Start the fire!"
Friday June 11,
1999
Tags #internal email, #use integration, #leverage, #communication, #perjury
Transcript
Lawyer: can you explain the meaning of this internal email message? Dilbert: It says we'll "Use integration tools to leverage the utility of our enterprise- wide processes. Dilbert: It appears to be something we call communication. Lawyer: Perjury!
Saturday June 26,
1999
Tags #Catbert, #evil, #director, #use the science, #determine potential, #riding proudly, #mighty thoroughbred horse, #jockey, #saddle
Transcript
Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. director" Catbert says, to Wally, "I will now use the science of facereading to dtermine your potential." CAtbert shines a flash light at Wally's face. Catbert says, "I see your face riding proudly atop a mighty thoroughbred horse." Wally says, "Jockey?" Catbert says, "Saddle."
Thursday December 02,
1999
Tags #no class, #need in offcie, #someplace else, #use you, #coffee cup, #walk around
Transcript
Alice stands in front of the boss's desk. The boss says to Alice while looking at a sheet of paper: "I can't send you to this class, Alice. We need you here." The boss says to Alice: "And after we use you up, we'll need you to be somewhere else." Alice says to Wally, who is standing in front of his cubicle: "What will I do when my skills are obsolete?" Wally answers while holding a cup of coffee: "Try walking around with a coffee cup"
Tuesday December 21,
1999
Tags #vp, #office, #spy, #lose document, #use tools, #desk, #avoid making decison, #procrastination
Transcript
2:19PM The VP Reads a Document. The subject tries to lose the document to avoid making deciosn. 2:21 PM The subject learns to use tools.
Saturday January 29,
2000
Tags #stressed out, #work, #feel better, #verbally abused, #co worker, #money spit, #use that one
Transcript
Dilbert is sitting between Wally and Ted and thinks: "I'm stressed out about work. Maybe I'd feel better if I verbally abused a co-worker." Ted raises his hand and screams to Dilbert: "You worthless piece of monkey spit!" Dilbert turns to Ted and thinks: "Dang. I was going to use that one." Ted rests his feet on the table, puts his hands on the back of his head and says: "Aah..."
Tuesday October 24,
2000
Tags #Catbert, #personal use, #stealing from company, #human resources, #form a gang, #business
Transcript
Catbert is standing on Wally's desk. Catbert says, "Your personal use of the internet is like stealing from the company!" Wally says, "You work in Human Resources; that's like stealing from the company, too." Wally continues, "Maybe we should form a gang."