User Specification Comic Strips - Page 3

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74 Results for User Specification

View 21 - 30 results for user specification comic strips. Discover the best "User Specification" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags user interface, colors, puke, flu, interface design

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Dilbert points to his computer and asks Alice, "I designed the user interface myself. How do you like the colors?" Alice throws up, "Puke." Dilbert asks, "Flu?" Alice responds, "Interface design."

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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags extreme programming, ruin my life, user story, Features

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Extreme Programming. Dilbert says to a business associate, "I can't give you all of these features in the first version." Dilbert continues, "And each feature needs to have what we call a 'user story.'" The business associate responds, "Okay, here's a story: you give me all of my features or I'll ruin your life.'"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags user requirements, build system, some actual work, crazy talk

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Dilbert is meeting with a client. Dilbert says, "I'll design the system as soon as you give me the user requirements." The client responds, "Better yet, you could build the system, then I'll tell your boss that it doesn't meet my needs." Dilbert says, "I don't mean to frighten you, but you'll have to do some actual work." The client responds, "That's crazy talk."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags great design, big seller, attractive, honor flaw, functionality, sex crimes, accuses user, cute

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"Product designer" "The new product is selling like crazy, thanks to it's great design." "Sales" "It's so attractive that people over look its minor flaws in functionality." "For example, it accuses the user of sex crimes whenever company comes over." "And it's cute!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags user interface, add button, random changes, create illusion, adding value

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The Boss: Why did you add this button to the user interface? Dilbert: You told me to. The boss: Why would I tell you that? Dilbert: You always suggest random changes to create the illusion of adding value. The Boss: Well, remove that button. Dilbert: It's only on your copy."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags designers, ignorance (knowledge), black buttons, black case, hardware, user interface, normal light, nerdy, art, package design

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Dilbert: You designed our hardware with black buttons on a black case. The user interface will be invisible in normal light. Designer: But more important, it looks great! Dilbert: You don't know what "important" means, do you? Designer: It sounds nerdy. I majored in art.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computer, engineer, worst user interface, click, sell social security number, overhead view of cubicle, technology, engineering

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Dilber thinks, "The world's greatest engineer prepares to do battle with the world's worst user interface." Dilbert thinks, "I hope that did something." Computer says, "Your social security number has been sold."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cost estimate, user requirements, estimate, go over budget, fired, Number, ten million dollars, know cost, input

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The Boss: "I need a cost estimate on your project." Dilbert: "I have no idea I haven't even gathered the user requirements." The Boss: "Don't worry I won't hold you to the estimate." Dilbert: "Yes you will. You will put it in the plan, forget we had this conversation, and fire me when I go over budget." The boss: "Give me a number or I'll fire you right now." Dilbert: "Okay, it will cost ten million dollars." The Boss: "That's too high." Dilbert: "If you already know the cost why are you asking me?" The Boss: "So you'll feel like you had input." Dilbert: "Is input supposed to feel this bad?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags enterprise software, premium package, friendly user, economy option, cheap one, never had girlfreind, adult website, romantic invitations, 100 percent

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Our enterprise software comes in two flavors. The premium package boats a friendly user interface. The economy option does the same stuff but the interface is designed to ruin your life. we'll take the cheap one. I can tell by the ay you hold the mouse that you've never had a girlfriend. I'll send romantic invitations to al the pope on the email address list. Dont worry - i"lll us etc text that I would on a great adult website. when I said that you need to give a hundred percent I shut have been more specific.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags gadgets, beat up, strangers, new glasses, with camera, less creepy, defenseless, user error, photoshopped, head on donkey

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Dilbert: Strangers keep beating me up for wearing our new glasses product with a camera. Boss: Have you tried acting less creepy and defenseless? Dilbert: No. Boss; Sounds like user error. Dilbert: I just Photoshopped your head on a donkey.