Wait For Answer Comic Strips - Page 3

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

414 Results for Wait For Answer

View 21 - 30 results for wait for answer comic strips. Discover the best "Wait For Answer" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #leadership seminar, #manager motivates employees, #14 hour days, #filthy sadist, #pointy haired imbecile, #leader, #unpopular decions, #training engineers

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, Dilbert and Wally grumble as they enter a leadership seminar. The instructor asks, "What would you call a manager who motivates employees to work fourteen hours a day?" Alice answers, "A filthy sadist." Dilbert answers, "Pointy-haired imbecile." The instructor says, "Umm . . . No . . . That's not what I'm looking for." Wally says, "I think he means what do we call him to his face." Alice, Dilbert and Wally answer in unison, "Leader." The instructor says, "Right! And what do you call someone who can make unpopular decisions again and again?" Someone replies, "A filthy sadist?" Another participant says, "Wait, it might be another trick question." The instructor thinks, "I hate training engineers."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #document, #on desk, #overdue, #last minute, #going home, #boss to dilbert, #wait until tomorrow, #sociopath, #spookily accurate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his cubicle and looks at his watch. he thinks, "Time to go home. That means..." The Boss shows up and says, "Hi there." Dilbert thinks, "Right on schedule." Dilbert holds up his hand and says, "Wait. Let me guess why you're here." Dilbert says, "You want to discuss a document that's been on your desk for a month." Dilbert says, "It's something that could easily wait until tomorrow." He says, "But you'll insist that I handle it now, because you're a sociopath." The Boss says, "Wrong. I majored in anthropology." The Boss walks away and thinks, "But that was a spookily accurate guess about the document."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #answer phone, #trick question, #meeting, #better get this, #phone rings, #ignores boss call, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss comes up behind Wally who sits at his desk. The boss says, "Wally, I've been calling you for two hours! Why don't you answer your phone?" Wally says, "Is that a trick question?" The boss says, "Wally, unless your in a meeting.." The phone rings. Wally says, "Hold on. I'd better get this."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #free medical advice, #some exercose, #lazy hog, #wait for ipo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert is sitting at his computer and Dilbert stands behind him. Dogbert says: "I'm creating a web site of free medical advice." Dogbert's hears stand up as he screams: "Get some exercise, you lazy hog!!" Dilbert asks Dogbert: "Is that it?" Dogbert answers: "Nothing to do now but wait for the IPO."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #limbo, #a division of heck, #career limbo section, #wait to be seated

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is at the threshold of an entrance bearing the sign: "Limbo, a division of Heck." Phil, the Ruler of Heck, tells Dilbert: "Step inside." Inside, standing by a "Please wait to be seated" sign, Phil informs Dilbert: "You'll be sitting in the Career Limbo section. Goodbye." Arms akimbo, Dilbert thinks to himself: "Jeepers! The service here is terrible!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #arm hair growth, #on phone, #wait in hall, #hair growing nicely, #wait for boss, #phone call, #asked to wait

View Transcript

Transcript

Outside the Boss's office, Carol, the Boss's secretary, tells Dilbert: "He's on the phone. You'll have to stand here and wait." She continues with her instructions to Dilbert: "Don't leave. Don't make noise. Don't try talking to me." Standing alone and waiting, Dilbert examines his arm and thinks to himself: "Arm hair LX-943 is growing nicely."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad assumptions, #analysis, #applied flawed logic, #predetermined answer, #disillusioning, #pie chart, #science

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert tells the Boss as he hands him a document: "I did the analysis using your bad assumptions." He continues as the Boss examines the document: "Then I applied your flawed logic and arrived at your predetermined answer." Dilbert asks the Boss: "Shall I begin disillusioning the team?" The Boss says about the document: "This needs a pie chart."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #delegate tasks, #cash flow estimate, #urgent, #boss must wait, #Dilbert, #assignment request, #wait a few days

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss peers into Dilbert's cubicle and thinks, "It's time to delegate." The Boss says, "Dilbert, I want you to give me a new cash flow estimate for your project." Dilbert replies, "Okay, fine." The Boss asks, "When will I get it?" Dilbert asks, "When do you need it?" The Boss says, "As soon as possible!" Dilbert says, "Okay." The Boss asks, "When do you think that will be?" Dilbert turns and says, "I usually wait a few days to see if you change your mind." Dilbert continues, "Then I'll give you last year's cash flow as a test to see if you read it." The Boss leaves the cubicle and thinks, "The more experience they get, the worse they are."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #vendor, #drinks, #answer questions, #works, #already wroking, #date, #private, #business, #confused, #misunderstanding

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice sits next to Dilbert and Wally at a conference table. She says, "I'm meeting a vendor for drinks tonight. He says it's the only time he has to answer my questions." Dilbert turns to Alice and says, "If that works, please let us know." Alice replies, "What do you mean 'works'? And who is 'us'?" Wally exclaims, "It's already working!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #management decision, #too distarcted, #make informed decison, #random, #no answer

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to The Boss, "...And that's why I need a management decision." The Boss says, "Hi, Bill!" Dilbert says, "But you are too distracted to make an informed decision, so this will be random." The Boss says, "Bob!" Dilbert says, "And here it comes." The Boss replies, "Would 'No' be an answer to anything you said?"